Women’s fear of settling down
27 July 2016, 16:03
Nairobi - Unlike for the men where ‘losing their
freedom’ plays an important part, it can be there for women but it does not
play such a big role. For us, it works differently.
More and more women are opting to remain
single or focus on their career first before marriage because of many reasons;
up having chosen the wrong man
See some marriages, both of aged couples
and young marriages, finding out how each person’s choice ruined some things
for them and how life has literally been turned upside down. You will not want
to be in the same situation ever. Here is where women apply- prevention is
better than cure. It is not that the men are not there, they are but you would
not want to end up with someone who will jinx the rest of your life if not a
portion of it.
we all know that marriage does actually change things
Mostly for women by the way unless you have
that new age, millennial of a husband who will respect your time and work as
you should his. The type of husband that will actually help take care of the
child because he also knows you are soon going to work. Men ask for paternity
leave but ask me where you will find them, not changing diapers I ASSURE YOU.
For a woman, the minute you choose to get
pregnant, that child actually is your life now- you will have to put you on
hold. No me time, or work, or social life- if there is social, it is odd days,
it is now time for family.
So when a woman chooses to deal with her
career and self-improvement before marriage and men, it is because we know that
some of those goals take a back seat or worst case scenario you never ever get
time. You tell yourself, let me give birth first, then I will go back-child 1
then child 2 by the time you are done you are just tired.
up with a misogynist
Our mothers and grandmothers married
misogynists. Very few men believe in 50-50, even with this era. But the women’s
thinking has changed, no one wants to be in a situation she can choose to do
without if that person does not hold her as an equal. Especially if it is that
women doing half of everything. Therein lies the problem. It is rarely 50-50
but 99-1 or if he is trying too hard 80-20 but if he is even close to 40% you
and 60% him; his soul is dying.
We do lose freedom
You see the way men are worried about
losing out on the women he still sees, outings with the boys he can still
easily go to; for women, you do lose personal freedom. As soon as I am giving
birth, there is obviously no way I am in the club because there is that time to
heal and when I am pregnant I cannot swill alcohol and be in the club as
I cannot leave without running around
looking for a nanny- the right nanny and even so when emergencies happen, they
call the mother first. Father normally finds out while being told a story after
the event. Then there is the husband who forgets how to function after getting
a wife- that is her job now. If he tries, it is to remember where his shirts
are. Women do lose freedom after marriage. It is a fact if you sit down and
actually think about it.
Disclaimer: All articles and letters published on MyNews24 have been independently written by members of News24's community. The views of users published on News24 are therefore their own and do not necessarily represent the views of News24. News24 editors also reserve the right to edit or delete any and all comments received.