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Why men hate independent ladies

03 February 2016, 17:03 Shakila Alivitsa

Nairobi - Modern lifestyle is still slapping some Africans around, especially Kenyans. We want to get it but we just can’t especially with all those customs, traditions and taboos. We want to buy the microwave but we don’t want the wife to warm food in it when we get home at ten in the night. Is it going to change? Probably not; as a man, you just need to learn to know when to pick your battles. Leave what Bi. Msafara is telling you; she is going to cost you your marriage or life.

The Kenyan man is one such frustrated husband.

He wants an independent woman but he also wants when he gets home, he gets there and finds his meal already cooked. Because she flew from work! He wants a woman who will help him pay the bills but he doesn’t want one who will nag him about consultation. He just wants to ask and all should be given or sorted from her side. He does not want a woman who will tell him what to do and how to do it; he just wants to do what he feels like doing and be the head of the household as well.

He does not want a help around or one who will prepare his meals yet he leaves the work in the am with the wife alongside him. Chances are he also knew her work hours while he was dating her but he chose that because he was happy he was going to have a helper and not an idler.

So as the Kenyan men, I would like to ask; ‘what do you want?’ Do you even have an idea what that is or you are just running with whatever seems to be working at the moment until real life slaps you with the reality of the situation?

 Why do you expect so much from your wife, yet you already knew what you were signing up for while dating her. You could just as easily chosen a drop out who was happy to stay at home as a housewife. You could just as easily have chosen a woman who was content to stay at home and wait on you. You could just as easily have chosen a wife with a not so demanding job so that she got home by five or six; a teacher could do that you know.

But Noooo, you wanted a well to do wife. One you could prop on your arm at work functions and brag about what she is currently doing and when you get home; still sit on her head. That will never happen you know. For every one decision that you make; always remember there is a consequence.

For that wife who is doing well in her career, earning enough or more to help support the family and still wearing high heels; you should know she will spend more time with progressing at work to maintain it and you will have the help. If you do not like that; you have the option of a 8-4 working girl; earning not enough for her own fare around Nairobi and barely enough to help split the bills. But what do you know? She might just have enough time to stir your tea and butter your bread and make it in time to cook supper. Probably spends weekends at home so no help to touch your clothes and she will leave the hectic decisions to you. She will probably not nag you about what happened to your last salary because she knows her place.

There is always a certain type of woman for every man; it is not so hard. So sit down, at your desk or whatever; maybe in the matatu in Nairobi’s evening traffic and jot down a list of what you want and are ready for. That way; the Kenyan modern wife will never disappoint you. You can find her better half who will not disappoint you so much.

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Disclaimer: All articles and letters published on MyNews24 have been independently written by members of News24's community. The views of users published on News24 are therefore their own and do not necessarily represent the views of News24. News24 editors also reserve the right to edit or delete any and all comments received.

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