When your man is a workaholic
10 March 2016, 20:10
Nairobi - It is no longer quite the assumption that it is only the man
that can be a workaholic. Women have also taken up the mantle and joined the
role of breadwinners. In a relationship, you cannot stand up and tell someone
to stop working for the sake of the relationship’s survival because the economy
is really tough in Kenya. With all that stealing that the government is doing,
we all have to do some pitching in-you know!
So how do you and your partner manage to make a lasting relationship
survive or make your marriage work when one of you is quiet the workaholic?
The first step will
obviously have to be that you accept your partner and their work
A lot of people will go into a relationship with the
assumption that maybe they will slow down after the kids start coming in. You
assume that you might be able to change them into accepting that their work is
coming in between you and them.
If their work is their lifeblood, you will need to accept
that this person will not give in to your demands so be willing and open minded
enough to know that you will have to work something out. The other option is to
get a partner who will not be bringing in anything or as much as your partner
does. Are you ready for that? Of course not, so you accept your partner and
You will also have to
have your own sort of thing going on
Assuming that the both of you are yet to have a family and
it is just the two of you. You will realize that with a workaholic partner is
that it is like they are barely even there. You do not want to lose them as
well because you also know that this person is the one for you. To keep you
from being miserable about it, you will have to have your own sort of life and
things going on. Have a good social life, developing your career as well and
what not. This will prevent you from being too miserable about their lack of
In the event that you two do have a family, you will need to
sit down as a couple and agree on family activities when your partner can
actually get away and not make up excuses. They will need to be committed to
this as well. Tell them to set aside time for work and time for family because
if you let them they will easily overlook your family. You will start to assume
that they do not care but it is only that you two never sat down and agreed on
some ground rules.
Patience will be
important from your part
From all the above you can see that you will definitely be
the one doing the most of the compromising. You can easily liken a relationship
with a workaholic with a long distance relationship. Because in both cases it
is like one partner is never there. You will need to be understanding and
patient. You will accept your role as a sort of compensator and the fact that
you give more than the ones in other relationships.
At the end of the day it is all a matter of choice. Less
working partner or a partner who practically does not work thus less earning at
the home or vice versa.
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