Create Profile

Creating your profile will enable you to submit photos and stories to get published on News24.

Please provide a username for your profile page:

This username must be unique, cannot be edited and will be used in the URL to your profile page across the entire 24.com network.

Facebook Sign-In

Hi News addict,

Join the News24 Community to be involved in breaking the news.

Log in with Facebook to comment and personalise news, weather and listings.


MyNews24 is a user-generated section of News24 Kenya. The stories here come from users.

Latest Badges:

What do you do when the child does not like you

23 May 2016, 18:26 Shakila Alivitsa

Nairobi - Royal mistake number one that most people do who are trying to get in the child’s good graces: buy gifts/ give money/ bribe them.

You cannot buy a child. No, you can actually not buy a child.

If you have been doing it and you thought it has been working, the child is probably laughing at you in their head. Children are not stupid, innocent maybe but not stupid.

The child knows what you are doing and that is why they will be snobbish every time that you are around-so that you can get them something. The child has noticed that you are desperate for that acceptance, so they are giving the only reaction that is bound to get you to keep doing and doing what they want.

The only way you will ever get to the child is with time. And how do you get time? By making sure, the relationship that comes first-with the parent- actually jumps through the hurdle.

Chasing after the child in the hopes that the parent will eventually like you and convince the parent is royally the worst move. If you never tried to win over the mother or father and the child is now bored with the rat race- Game over!

For most good parents, the child comes first so if they say, ‘I do not like him/ her.’ Or God forbid, ‘I do not like the way he/she stares at me.’ You might not be staring but after that one word you are done for.

You need to convince the child that you are actually good for the parent and want to provide a better life with them. Don’t buy gifts or constantly bribing to get them to like your jokes. You are already starting this parenting on the wrong foot if the relationship ever skips over to permanence. It will now be something they will hold over your head in the relationship.

Guess what happens when the child starts acting up even after you get that commitment, the single parent will now say, you had been pretending all this while. They now doubt you because even they bought into the idea of your gift giving as your show of ‘love’ for the child. See, you never cultivated the right type of relationship with either of them-Game over. Again!

Don’t rush for that acceptance early on in the relationship. You need that child to respect you not treat you like a peasant because what that child wants, they get. You can talk to them, ask after them, the odd gift once in a while but do not make it an everyday thing. The gift even comes later when the child starts behaving but don’t chase after good behavior within a month by bribes. That child will make you sweat.  And when they are done, they will still not like you.

It gets better if the other parent still comes around; gift here, gift there, so they are enjoying themselves.

People do not understand how hard it is dating a single parent especially ones with any child from 3 years old and still not a teenager. We all pray for the ones that are married. If you are young that means you are dating someone that is 50 that is why we all have the tiny ones that frustrate you.

If you are not pleasing the parent, you are trying to please the child. Your dating time is reduced to 2% because 98 is going to sick days, emergencies, baby sitting at home (not actually a date) because there is no one to watch the child, and being a parent that is not a parent.  The last bit is the one that people dislike. When the parent that you are trying to date cannot make it and they ask you to fill in; you sort of have to jump in to show you are committed. The hoops people jump through and they will never tell you until you are in there.

Moral of the article; you cannot buy kids. You can try, they will enjoy it but you really are the joke here because they don’t respect you. Reason is, when they say jump you are already targeting how high they want, not even asking. Sorry!

- MyNews24

Disclaimer: All articles and letters published on MyNews24 have been independently written by members of News24's community. The views of users published on News24 are therefore their own and do not necessarily represent the views of News24. News24 editors also reserve the right to edit or delete any and all comments received.

Read more from our Users

Submitted by
Wilson Ochieng
Apologise for attack on Auditor G...

Apologise for attack on Auditor General, President Uhuru Kenyatta is told by Kisumu Senator Anyang Nyong'o. Read more...

Submitted by
Wilson Ochieng
Quit if you can't fight corruptio...

An MP has told President Uhuru Kenyatta to quit office if he cannot fight corruption. Read more...

Submitted by
Wilson Ochieng
Investigate Uhuru, Ruto for corru...

Investigate President Uhuru Kenyatta and DP William Ruto's offices over corruption, CORD leader Raila Odinga has said. Read more...

Submitted by
Victor Tinto
Its a 1 horse race to State House...

Its a 1 horse race to State House, DP William Ruto has mocked the CORD Coalition. Read more...

Submitted by
Victor Tinto
Enjoy your time left in power, We...

CORD Co Principal Moses Wetangu'la has told the Jubilee Coalition to enjoy its last few months in power before it is voted out in the 2017 elections. Read more...

Submitted by
Victor Tinto
Stop hiding in State House and sa...

ODM MP's have called on President Uhuru Kenyatta to release drought aid and to stop sitting on public funds. Read more...