What a virgin should expect in marriage
04 August 2016, 10:14
I heard an interesting story some time back of a naive church sister who got married to a brother and when they were done with the wedding, they headed to the hotel room. After settling down and the brother was ready for business, he was in for a big surprise as the lady kept pushing him away and thwarting his efforts for intimacy.
She called the pastor and accused the bridegroom of trying to defile her. She claimed that she had kept herself pure and wanted to remain so.
This is the story of many ladies. After marriage, they still want to maintain autonomy and be independent. This causes a lot of strain in marriage relationships. When instead of having one vision and being one, we have two separate individuals who don't want to merge and be one flesh.
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The sexual act encapsulates the spirit and expectation of a marriage. The woman is expected to open up and receive her loving husband. The two become one flesh and have a singular vision. The man entrusts her with his vision or seed which she gestates until it is fulfilled. The two work in unity and perfect harmony to ensure that the goal of increasing and having dominion in their mandate is fulfilled.
A house divided cannot stand and the parties need to learn the art of leaving the past and cleaving and making something new. The lady must learn to accommodate the man and assimilate his vision and carry it as her own.
A tall order indeed, but one with great rewards and dividends. The fast encounter for a virgin may be painful as the hymen breaks but it becomes more enjoyable with time. For unity to be realized, there must be giving in and accepting the other person into our inner circle and sometimes this also calls for us to surrender control.
God loves it when people live in harmony and there he commands a blessing because unity and oneness is a reflection of God who is in trinity as well.
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