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The type of men I submit to

10 October 2016, 21:05 Shakila Alivitsa

Nairobi - When a pan of cold water with a frog in it is placed on fire, the frog does not jump out immediately. It is sort of a gradual thing. Up until that water is actually very hot and boiling, is when the frog jumps out. Before it was just calm, adjusting itself to the surroundings.

I think it is sort of the same thing with us women. I am not saying we are frogs. But we can relate on some levels. What is a frog? Is it a cold-blooded animal or amphibian, I really did not like biology. I actually have to Google the answer. I was actually right, it is both of those things; not so bad for a science hater, no offense but I did really fail this subject.

Women are adaptable like frogs- to a point! A woman will have a type but as proven since time immemorial, we adjust our tastes depending on the circumstances. Today I will like tall but when tall is shady and lazy but average is hardworking and spends on me- I adapt! Sort of the like the frog and the hot water!

What does this have to do with women and their submissiveness? I will talk about it, long but not too long. Just so you can understand, the men, mostly Kenyan men. Since they will not shut up about it.

As a woman, get into my head for a minute. We are dating, I am very sweet on you; do you think that I go into the relationship with a combative mind-set? That I am being nice now and just biding my time until I can start bringing my true colours? There is that element but not the way you think.

Women approach relationship with a very open mind-set.

It is the type of temperature you keep introducing that determines the reaction you will get from her.

While dating, she will be worried about you, ask you what you want to eat and if you are okay; because in the beginning you are treating her nicely. You take her out, actually make effort, and buy her a gift or two. You impress her, you make her feel nice- that is why she is sweet. She wants to please you and that is where the element of submissiveness comes in. You will not see her trying to haggle with you every inane point.

She is agreeable and willing. What happens after you settle her in a relationship with you or you marry her? You introduce her to new temperatures. It is that simple really. You become the hot boiling water she wants to get away from. You do less but expect more from her. You cannot demand submissiveness from a woman who no longer feels appreciated or wanted in a situation. You cannot do things once in a while unlike you used to and make her adapt in minutes.

For a woman, it is the gradual effect and once she is trying to get away from it; you will not so easily bring it back that is when the combatant comes out. No matter how many good intentions you have, she has already adapted to the changes and the reactions you are now getting are not of the lady you first liked but the lady you eventually made. She will approach you with a dose of apprehension that is when you ask why you no longer do this for me, you are first met with disdain and not open-mindedness!

Men, the ball has always been in your caught, if you do not know how to play it; sit down and let the real men do so please!


- MyNews24

Disclaimer: All articles and letters published on MyNews24 have been independently written by members of News24's community. The views of users published on News24 are therefore their own and do not necessarily represent the views of News24. News24 editors also reserve the right to edit or delete any and all comments received.

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