The real reason he has not proposed
09 February 2016, 19:19
Nairobi - I would not call it a crisis. The Eurobond is a crisis and
when the people who implement stealing are declared clueless; that is a crisis.
But in the other hand, in Kenya we are facing less and less marriage proposals;
less and less relationships and less and less commitment. We all just seem to
want the freedom to jump with whomever and whoever and wherever. We want
freedom from commitment.
On the other end of the stick; there are a couple of women
who are still trying to hold it together and hold out for the ring. But because
of the aforementioned situation, there is not end in sight for them where the
man in question is involved. It is not that you are a bad woman; you are doing
better than the current crop. You also do know that the guy wants to eventually
settle down and have a family but he does not want to do it with you.
You think of yourself above him. Not necessarily out of his
league but your interactions with him seem to be those of a person who sees
herself above the other one. No man wants to ever deal with a woman whom he can
clearly see she views him as her lesser.
It can be that simple. It does not even have to come from
your words but your actions; you will not have to say it but he can see it.
Today’s jobs don’t guarantee that the man will earn less
than the woman. The women are making strides but they also want families. The
problem with most Kenyan women is that she will show that in her relationship
as well-sort of like she can walk all over him; simply because she earns more.
At times she will not even consult or communicate what she
is planning because she is thinking that is a show of submissiveness and her
weakness. If he asks, she will just answer that either way she could afford and
pay for it overlooking the fact that she is not treating him as a partner but
as a child.
At time, the woman might earn less and the man more but she
will view herself to be of a more affluent upbringing than his. Maybe he
struggled and he is a newcomer; not old money like she is. She will treat him
that way in checking his mannerisms while they go out or even at home; making
sure he never puts his guard down around her because she will tell him, ‘That
is not how we…’
The whole relationship is about her showing him, teaching
him and eventually leading him; from his mother’s drawstring to hers. Who wants
that especially when lifetime is involved? He will simply just not choose you
no matter how much you think you bring to the table.
Disclaimer: All articles and letters published on MyNews24 have been independently written by members of News24's community. The views of users published on News24 are therefore their own and do not necessarily represent the views of News24. News24 editors also reserve the right to edit or delete any and all comments received.