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Solving jealousy issues in order to save your relationship

06 June 2016, 14:09 Shakila Alivitsa

I was having lunch with my girlfriend and her latest boo. He was on his phone. I am not sure whether he was checking messages or whatever but just when he is about done; my friend stops whatever she is doing and extends her head to see what he was doing in his phone. I do not even think that the relationship is two months old but she is already checking his phone.

He gives her a quizzical look and I laugh that strangled laugh (ha.ha.ha) to lighten the mood and she just smiles like a cat but I saw the look he gave her. By the way, women, never let a man know you are insecure because that taps into your confidence; the one he thinks you have. Confidence makes you sexy to a man even if you have already nabbed him. But the minute you show insecurity, it points to a lack of confidence in self and that makes a man wonder whether he made a right choice in being with you. He starts wondering whether you are not as beautiful as he thought you are and that will make him dump you. Men like the idea that they won the race by having the best. That is how it works. Just don’t show insecurity; wait until late in the relationship to be a paranoid person.

If you really like someone, you will not want to end the relationship if you think you have a really good chance of a good relationship as long as you can manage their insecurities and jealousy.

You will have to be too open and transparent with your activities.

You will have to be more transparent with your activities as compared to other couples. They will ask you anything and everything and you will have to just tell them what you are up to even though as an adult you head rebels against such. You will not want to but you will have to just to earn their trust slowly. ‘Who are you talking to?’ ‘Sam/Jane’ (don’t lie just tell them). If you lie, you impress upon them that now there is something they need to figure out.  They will eventually just learn to trust you.

It will be a job but you will be the one that makes them feel secure

You will have to convince them that no one in the world holds a candle to them. You cannot even sneak a look while you are with them when someone extremely beautiful or handsome passes. You will have to be eternally blind as long as you are in that relationship. They will look, then they will ask you a dumb question; ‘Isn’t she beautiful?’ ‘She has a really nice ass’ Don’t lie and say, ‘No’. Say, ‘I had not even noticed. We were talking. Remember?’ Then look and say ‘Oh’ and act negligent in your perusal. It will pain you, but you chose them. You will slowly have to work at this until they learn not to ask you such things.

You will have to tease them about their relationships with the opposite sex as well

This is how it will work. I am not sure if they are the catch of the century but if they are not, you are going to have to make up stuff like how someone was staring at them. It will make them feel like it is normal for you to have other interactions outside the relationship just as it may be for them. It assures them that they do not have to mean anything.  And you are not trying to do anything.


- MyNews24

Disclaimer: All articles and letters published on MyNews24 have been independently written by members of News24's community. The views of users published on News24 are therefore their own and do not necessarily represent the views of News24. News24 editors also reserve the right to edit or delete any and all comments received.

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