Simple rules when marrying a Kenyan man
07 September 2016, 12:36
Nairobi - I was reading something and it was telling
men what to do to make them the perfect boyfriend.
So one of the things suggested was when
‘she’, the girlfriend complains about having a rough day, the man should rush
home and sort out her chores so that when she gets home she will not have to
deal with them. ‘She’ will highly appreciate it. Makes sense, until I pictured
a Kenyan boyfriend and girlfriend and imagined such a conversation.
This reminds me of a story my mother told
me when she was married to my father and they were settling in as a couple. The
first baby comes and what help did she have from the father? He would sit and
wait for supper while she ran around cleaning the baby, feeding the baby,
cleaning the house and utensils left in the morning and then settle down to
start preparing supper. His work was to hold the baby. Not even a sniffle like
where do you need help. Nothing like that; she had to figure everything out
while he rested after a long day on the sofa.
Now imagine yourself having a conversation
with your boyfriend after you have had a long day. What will be his reply?
A. My boss is also the same. It happens. By
the way I am meeting the boys in the evening will be late for supper.
B. What are we having for supper?
C. Don’t worry about it! (You get home and
even dinner is cooked)
Kenyan men make a shift after they put that
ring on your finger and if it is not immediate it comes later.
Whereas he cooked, please forget that he
will keep doing it because he now has a wife unless he actually enjoys it or
wants to but don’t expect it.
If he is agreeing to take out now; wait
until you marry him and suggest the idea again on one of those nights that you
are actually tired. How can a wife even suggest such a thing? What are you for?
If he knows how to do his own laundry; feel
blessed if he even manages to do his own shoes. It is taboo for him to even
wash his own shirt when he has a laundry machine in the name of a wife. Let us
not even get into washing utensils.
Once a man has a wife, it is not the thing
to have her with him when he goes out with the boys. Where she used to get the
odd invite, a wife should not sit and listen to the big boys talk. She should
do wife things- like handling children. If your wife is not always at home, she
is a bad wife. A wife cannot keep going out when she is married. If your
husband remembers to take you out on even one date night a week; appreciate
A maid should only be brought in, in dire
circumstances. Heaven forbid the maid sets the table for breakfast and he has a
wife to serve him. Some men don’t even eat food made by the maid by the way.
The wife has to cook it- did she die while he was away?
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