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Relationship lessons women SHOULD learn from Victoria Beckham

15 February 2016, 12:38 Shakila Alivitsa

Nairobi - Victoria Beckham and David Beckham?

David Beckham is most definitely one of the sexiest men on earth; if you disagree, you are a hater. He has that certain thing you just don’t have a certain name for but definitely makes you take a pause as a woman!

Did he always have it? No!  Look for pictures at the start of his football career; definitely did not have it.

Oh, I cannot write this article without including our very own Potus. Brilliant man but I think he used to smoke weed at some point but what does he have in common with Beckham? They both had women who were willing to put in the hard work that changed the frog to the Prince that he is today or the king!

Women who were willing to put in the hard work that made the diamond that was rough around the edges shine! They made their own men.

She did not find him perfect. She did not find him wholesome or having everything going on for him but she saw what any other woman would have easily overlooked. She saw what she could make of the man before he could have seen it himself. I am not talking about potential and loyalty; these men just had it but it just had to have a little help or push before it could become what it needed to be.

Give them to any other woman and they might just have come out different-maybe not changed or just surviving with whatever they had. They might have come out wrong.

That is one of the things that I think women should look out for while looking for their other half. You go about it wrong when you are already discounting him because he is not looking clean and sharp. I once went to meet someone and trust me he was not looking very sharp. His shoes were messed up, his attire not well put together, no haircut and the beard was shabby; just as I was about to flee, I asked myself, ‘…But these are things I can actually change. Can’t I?

Women are always looking to change character and mindset when it comes to a man and those are one of the hardest things to change unless he wants it as well. But if a man is a plus in every other way-treats you well, good father and husband material, looking to do better; why not? When you say he does not look like your type, in what sense? I can assure you, those men who are looking good even though single; went through a woman who would not let him be. He was a representation of her and she made sure he remembered it every day.  If he is not well put together, you can do that.

Men make money but not all of them know how to structure it; if a guy is able to consider what you would do and the best go ahead, why not consider him? You can make the rest of what is not working for you go away as long as you approach the issue in the right way.

If he is not romantic but is a good man; you can change that. Trust me. I have done it. One of my relationships, the guy was jobless and we never even went for dates at all. When he got a job finally; it was still the same but I knew I had just been okay with the situation because I understood the situation-no money, no dates .But now, he had a job and I wanted to do things differently. I just said what I wanted. I did not keep quiet and sulk or hold grudges. I spoke up.  I told him what I needed and expected from him. If I wanted a drink and dinner, I said so. If I wanted to go somewhere in the weekend, I said where.

You can’t expect a man to come in and know what you need from him and be perfect about it. Jesus will not come as Jesus, He will apparently come as a beggar or something and we will be spiteful and be petty like Kenyans like to be. But see he is Jesus; only few will see that special something and will go to heaven the rest of us will die!

That is the same way you should look at your future boyfriend or partner while searching. He might already be there, but you are being petty or spiteful because his look is not pleasing to the eye. How many footballers were doing better than Beckham in his time and she was Posh from Spice girls, she could have had her pick but she did not. She chose the gangly looking guy with bad air, bad teeth and a terrible accent; she chose Beckham and they came up together. Where are those other footballers? But look where Beckham is, doing better and being greater with a great family because he had the right spouse/partner. 

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Disclaimer: All articles and letters published on MyNews24 have been independently written by members of News24's community. The views of users published on News24 are therefore their own and do not necessarily represent the views of News24. News24 editors also reserve the right to edit or delete any and all comments received.

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