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I want to date an 'ugly' man

06 May 2016, 19:31 Shakila Alivitsa

Nairobi - I did not want to call someone ugly. I think that people just need some polishing here and there and what you might have thought was not beautiful is beautiful.

But back to my story; I was getting tips on why a guy might not want to contact you after dating you and then it clicked in my head why I like not-so -good looking men.  My mother still finds it ludicrous that I do not want to marry a handsome man.

I have my reasons but to mention it basically, I do not like unnecessary stress. A man who is handsome and knows it, he will just sumbua you.

In dating, the type of man you want is the one that is very shy, will not approach you and will probably die if you even sneeze in his direction-the one that is not standing out. Not-so good looking men will most of the time find it very intimidating to ask you out, especially if you are a beautiful woman.  There is this assumption that most of us beautiful women would only date that handsome guy who everyone wants at the office. No we don’t. We like being pretty so we do not want someone to give us grey hair because he is the ‘it’ thing.

We want someone that will appreciate us the right way and respect us the way we need to be respected. That is why to most of you, you are looking at that lovely lady and you are wondering what she is doing with ‘that’ man-that is not her type. You don’t need to understand it but it just means that she is being smart or was smart and knows what it means when a man worships the ground you walk on. Not in a bad way because some of you like being angry about everything someone says.

This man will never treat you badly because he knows you had other options but you chose to single him out and find out he was about.

These handsome men that everyone wants will not date you properly. He will have a one minute attention span because now it is on that skirt, next that dress, next he likes her hair and because they all want him, that is why he is taking five working days to reply your text or get back to you. If you even ask him to properly pursue you like a woman that is serious about a relationship needs to be pursued; this man will not do that for you. He is in a candy store-literally.

If you have an issue and maybe be mad like you know, the way us women do so that he comes around and talks to you about it, this guy will just be like, ‘I do not need to be here for this.’ Because he knows that as soon as he drops you, there is someone waiting for him. Probably was there all through the relationship. Most of them do not know how to be in a relationship because they have learnt that as long as they have a face they can have as many as they want and the women will not min. Some will even share. Do you want that?

Choose the not-so-good looking man and polish him yourself. He might not know how to pick an outfit but that is your job; get a haircut that suits him and your job is done. If he is kind, loves you, wants to take care of you and be there for you-what more do you want?

Stop fighting for a position where everyone is put on the same pedestal that the man does not even have time to appreciate you. Look for that one who gets no time from any woman at all and be smart-get yourself the right husband who will remember to call you after a date; will always be planning his next date with you that you do not have to beg for his time. He will be planning your proposal because he knows he is lucky to have you not the one you have to beg and question whether you are even in a relationship with. Look for someone who cannot wait to be a good husband to you and be happy to see you age. Get you an ugly man.

I bet you are wondering if I have ever dated one. I have been very unlucky. I can’t seem to pin down one ugly man and make him my man. I just get this other ones. Most of them doubt my intentions from the beginning and think I am planning something-so most of the time they think am setting them up. So if you are an ugly man, stop having no confidence and approach us; most of the time you are ignoring someone and assuming that just because they look a certain way, they must be in a relationship. No we are not, we are single and not all of us want to end up with handsome men.

If she approaches you, do not doubt her. Maybe she likes that you are kind and shy, not all of us want pompous jerks that are loud in a room. You do not have to talk about your money and what you have because some people just like getting to know people. You can come across the wrong way trying to make an impression to make someone stay.

- MyNews24

Disclaimer: All articles and letters published on MyNews24 have been independently written by members of News24's community. The views of users published on News24 are therefore their own and do not necessarily represent the views of News24. News24 editors also reserve the right to edit or delete any and all comments received.

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