How relatives kill relationships
17 January 2016, 12:32
Nairobi - I am rarely a champion of people who are in my business, and
who better to classify these other than relatives. I was reading a story about
how a certain aunt decided to call her niece’s boyfriend and carry tales about
what she was ‘apparently’ up to while he was away.
You know what caught my attention here was the fact that it
was an aunt. Normally when it is your friend, we tend to understand because
maybe she wants him for herself or she is trying to ruin you in his eyes
because again, she wants him. That sort of thing, but an aunt; where is the
gain for her in the whole scenario? Where is the loyalty? I know that maybe the
woman might have been in the wrong in some cases, the one who is being told on
that is, but shouldn’t the aunt be an advisor rather than the one helping in
destruction. And how did she get his number? The mother, fine; the
sister, maybe but an aunt; she must have gone through her niece’s phone.
Women keep complaining about how there are no good men
around or the last one had a problem but at times you might just have had the
best one but you allowed other people to come in and help ruin it. Women need
to learn and watch the type of people they keep around them especially of the
Watch that one who
comes and criticizes you in your home in front of your husband
She is always full of praise when the two of you are
together. Telling you how much you have accomplished and what type of good
mother you are. That sort of thing, she makes you secure in her words such by
the time she is tearing you down, you look at it as her being good natured. The
tearing down comes in when your husband is around, ‘why isn’t so and so (one of
your children) paying attention to their father, you should caution them as
their mother!’ Then you laugh it off saying... ’Aunty you know how kids for
today are…’ hahahahaha. Or ‘I did not
teach you to make food like this, you should have done this instead, you need
to learn how to cook better for your husband’. Now you, ‘hahahahahaha… I will
do it next time or you can come help. I was tired today from work (then you
Aunty failed in her own house, now she is coming to help you
in yours. At times bitterness can be
what is driving someone; watch the people whom you choose to bring around you
because they will bring the same in your life.
The one who comes to
visit and never foregoes to tell your husband a story or two from your younger
Remember when you told your husband he was your second and
only. Why did you allow your certain so and so to get so close with your
husband because they have come to disabuse him of that notion? They will talk
about the neighbor whom you said was just a friend. They will talk about the friend
you introduced whom you did such and such with or when your husband points
something out, she gives out a fake laugh that implies sarcasm. Now she is
creating an illusion of how your marriage was founded on lies and distrust.
That destroys everything and now makes him question you now more than ever.
Every time you bring something up, ‘I can’t trust you; remember when you told
The one you tell
something to in confidence then they carry it back
It was meant to be something between the two of you. Then
she waits when you are not around or while she is having an innocent
conversation with him; she then drops the bombshell. Or the one who acts like
she is trying to help and give advice but ends up spilling the beans, ‘Oh she
never told you?’
There is only one rule that I will ever tell you as a woman
when it comes to your husband or boyfriend, ‘Don’t let any women get too close
to him.’ By women I mean those especially from your side. Some of you are
wasting time on his friends, his colleagues; looking in the wrong pot. While
your friend, sister, aunt or even workmate is eyeing him just while you are
standing there because you apparently trust them.
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