Choosing between two men on whom to settle with
07 June 2016, 20:34
Nairobi - You have been seeing two guys (unless you
are seeing five hundred people, in which case we cannot help you), and they
both seem like they have the qualities that you desire in your partner. I don’t
think polyandry has caught on so you cannot have them both.
You need to decide on one and as much as
you think they are both amazing, there are things that make one more what you
need than making them both what you want.
has to have been more committed to you unlike the other
They were more committed towards the
relationship while the other one still chose to see other people. I am hoping
that you were all open enough with each other and you let them know that you
were still trying to decide. If you were that open then there should be one or
both who told you they were going ‘to do them’ as you are.
Eventually you will be able to tell the one
that was more attentive and committed to making this work while the other still
had more options out there. The latter is the one that you should let go of and
the former is the one you should choose as a partner. That type of commitment
does not come easy especially when you know someone is seeing other people. If
you pick the last guy, he will eventually just tell you he was still seeing
other people and your novelty has faded.
need to have deal breakers
You know those that we are told that we can
compromise on while we are still searching? So you forget about them because it
makes sense to be open minded. This is the time to take them out and you will
find that it is easier to make a choice that will help you have a healthy and
able to distinguish the pros and cons of each of their qualities; find out whom
you are compatible with.
Write them down if possible and they will
help you make a better decision as to whom you are more compatible with.
gets along more with everybody else; friends, family and the people generally
in your life?
It will make you work easier. We all like
to think that other people are not in a relationship with us until we are
actually experiencing this. If they do not care for, want to mingle or even
relate to the people closest to you, that is a major deal breaker.
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