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Advice from my father about what men like

15 August 2016, 15:00 Shakila Alivitsa

Nairobi - So the most incredulous thing happened this past Saturday. In my house, all of us girls we act like we will know of boys when we enter our husband’s house. We don’t even know what dating is, we will meet him at the altar by some chance.

Very normal in any African home.

On this Saturday though, my father tells me, he will drop me off to work, tells me, and not asks. There is no way I was going to say no or make up anything. I was going to have to wait until he was done with his tea then we were all going to leave together.

I just knew he has something up his sleeve; we rarely talk and I was already suspicious. At least I was saving the humongous fare from Rongai and that is how I chose to look at it.

After some mundane small talk and a bit of silence, he finally gets it off his chest, ‘….but Shakila, don’t you think you put on too much make up?’

To say I was a bit taken back by the statement would be an understatement. You see the way your mother slapped you, but you never saw it coming, you could not even tear up because you were not sure that she had just slapped you- that reaction!

Guys, I had just put on eyeliner and lipstick; but to my dad that was too much make up. I asked him how and mentioned how maybe my lipstick is what was turning him off. It was not even red, pink or bright but just a matte brown.

‘You have put make up on the eyes, the lips, you know people don’t like that.’ By people you already know he is talking about men.

I think my dad is worried I might end up a spinster in his house. I was amused. Because am clocking that dreaded age and he has not seen me holding hands with a man outside his gate or leave the house at odd hours to see someone or even surprised him with a child.

He is now worried that maybe I wear too much make up and that is why men don’t want me. My dada was trying to figure in his mind why I have not had an ‘accident’ that would take me off his hands.

He decides to give me pointers on what men like. He has no idea of how times have changed. Had to tell him how presentation matters and how my face works to my advantage most times.

He thinks once a man sees you in make-up it mean you are high maintenance. I am high maintenance but I have not asked for any help from a man so far so I think I am good. The one who will take me as I am will be the one that needs to be there.

Shame on me if I go around bare faced just to attract a man and cry foul when I want to change it up and he does not like it.

The one who wants you will take you as you are and not the way you pretend to be. And anyway, I like make –up because I am a woman and I just like to complicate my life.

On that note, I cannot wait for the next topic my father comes up with, with regard to my man less state.


- MyNews24

Disclaimer: All articles and letters published on MyNews24 have been independently written by members of News24's community. The views of users published on News24 are therefore their own and do not necessarily represent the views of News24. News24 editors also reserve the right to edit or delete any and all comments received.

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