Why do women stay too long in relationships?
10 September 2015, 21:30
Nairobi - Dating is one of the intrinsic stages of any relationship. Courtship allows partners to explore and know each other more. It’s very essential to date a person who is as interested in you as you are in them. If getting the person out on a date feels like pulling a tooth, it’s time to pull the plug. It’s important to keep in mind that being with you and going out with you should be a pleasure, not a favour.
But why do women stick around?
Many women spend far too long trying to figure out if they should continue to date a man. And they hang in there long after it’s clear to them and everyone else that they’re with the wrong guy and in the wrong relationship. Often, if not always, they give a myriad excuses ranging from love and patience. I have heard women say more than once that they want to “give him a chance” and are “waiting for him to come around.”
I feel that we demean ourselves when we stick to relationships that we know too well won’t last or worse, work. This however does not only hold for women but for men too. If a person shows you that they are not into you, it’s time to move on. Many women tend to ignore the all too obvious and unmistakable signs that show lack of interest. When out on a date, his focus should be on you, not some hot woman in the next table or the plasma TV at the bar. If his eyes are darting around like Nixon’s, feeding on everything but your face, he is making it clear you don’t hold his interest. If he talks to you casually just like he does to his buddies, he’s probably not into you. Believe me, when a guy is interested, there's always at least a slight difference in how he goes about speaking with you, a variation that proves he's interested. It’s easy to know when a guy is interested in you as he has a special way of talking to you, or extends some special kind of attention, something that he doesn't do with anyone else.
As hurting as it may be, you need to accept that and move on. It’s sad when women say; but he is really a good guy on the inside, he will change, he is starting to change, I don’t want to be alone or, my age is catching up with me. Whatever excuses there are in the world, we all deserve to be happy. We need to open our hearts to other things and new people. On the other hand, we need to set other people free.
I say, find someone who values and appreciates you, not a person who leaves you wondering whether the weekend plans are on. If you can, divorce yourself from presuming the other person’s feelings, you will only get hurt if they do not match your expectations.
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