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Single? Stop Waiting and live your life

28 October 2015, 08:06 Anne Muigai

Nairobi - Being single can be a sucker but can be a gloriously freeing and liberating experience. Most single people, however, stress over finding love, and the perfect life partner. They spend so much time waiting around, envying their friends and sometimes, overstretching just to attract their ultimate partners.

My childhood friend Betsy has been single for as long as I can remember. The last one year has seen her transform into a whole new unattractive being. She has bought and wore weird pieces in a bid to attract, said and did things she would normally not say or do in an effort to draw attention and appear “cool”.

When I introduced her to my relationship consultant friend, he simply said to her, “Betsy, you need to calm down, chill out, and stop expecting love to be here already. Your sense of entitlement is killing your ability to attract a good man.” When Betsy realized he was right, she stopped waking up every day feeling angry that love hadn’t found her yet. She stopped being resentful that her friends were married and having lives that felt out of reach to her. She steered away from feeling like her life was on hold. She stopped waiting and started living. Overnight, her outlook changed.

And what she got out of life changed too. In the last couple of months, she has met great men wherever she goes. She is currently dating and having fun. Why has life been so gracious to her? It’s simple because she changed her outlook towards life, herself and relationships. She realized that her happiness is not dependent on a romantic relationship, and neither is her achievement in life measure by the pace of her friends’ lives.

If you are single and struggling in your search, look within and ask yourself what part of your own life still needs work. Someone said that when you clean up your side of the street, you make room for a perfectly imperfect person to see you, celebrate you and love you.

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