Simplicity lacking in Kenyan relationships
11 June 2015, 12:33
Nairobi - Too much too soon is the problem with dating and why none
ever progress into anything meaningful-relationships!
Everyone is single and everyone is looking, even the guys
look. It gets to be tedious and boring to be doing the same thing every
weekend. Go out, party hard and come back home to nothing but yourself! Or
going out with different people every other weekend or the odd weekday and
nothing seems to be clicking with them.
On the upside, at least you have no one bickering your ears
off on where you were or what you were doing but when it becomes a constant
that is when you start realizing that you actually want to be in a relationship
with someone. But where are they?
I think the problem with our current modern Kenyan social
circle is that we have put it in our heads that if it is not richly done then
it is not worth it. A friend of mine, I am using that term loosely, mockingly
laughed at me because a date I once went on was at his favorite bar and it was not at some ritzy joint.
I look at it this way, I got to know his favorite joint, so
1 to me and 0 to her because she goes to all those fancy restaurants but has
never been in any meaningful relationship. Which is everybody’s problem.
I do not even think
that anyone who is not a teenager goes to the movies anymore or just a simple
burger on the Sunday afternoon. Yes, you will get it smudged all over your face
but if they cannot like you when you have sauce all over your make-up then they
are not worth it.
You go out for a date at night let me tell you how it ruins
everything even before it starts. The taxi, someone has to be picked up and
dropped off from somewhere. Is he the one that is going to pick you up? What if
you live far? If he does not offer then he already is not a gentleman. One
person gets there before the other, and since it is dinner one has to keep
waving the waiter away, if it is the woman, she is already getting angry
because everyone else is dining. He is not keeping her waiting out of liking
but Nairobi traffic is like a mad man playing Russian roulette with your face.
At dinner, you cannot have a meaningful conversation,
because you are stuffing your face and trying to count what course number you
are on. You are also trying not to be
the noisy person because all you can hear is forks against plates. You can only
whisper! That is the problem with asking someone out for a late night dinner
date. It cannot be simple, but exhausting thought has to be put into
everything, by the time you are having the date, everyone is anxious if the
other person is enjoying themselves.
You may not agree with me and maybe they have been working
for you so far, but how many dates have you gone for or planned since the
beginning of the year? And with how many different people? So many numbers but
you are still running the same merry go round as you did last month-you are
still looking and searching for someone that you can have a meaningful
something with. Your phone book comprises of numbers or men or women you have
not talked to since two years ago. If you are such a person then there is no
difference between you and a teenager at a funky!
Simple dates is what some of you need. Everyone is
overthinking the whole process, by the time you drop her home you know nothing
about her, so she or he is cancelled and you are already looking for your next
prey. Not because they were terrible but because the atmosphere was too rigid.
Personally, I think expensive dates should only be done
after the two of you have known each other and you think there just may be
something here. The other person is actually worth it.
Just imagine all that money you have been spending on skunks every other weekend, because she
requested it yet she did not know the difference between a fish knife and a
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