Ladies, are you a faulty lock?
11 March 2015, 16:37
Nairobi - ‘A key that opens many
locks is a master key, but a lock that is opened by many keys is a faulty lock.’
These are words of wisdom
imparted to me by a male colleague that I had to share with everyone especially
my female counterparts seeing as we are developing into a nation of feminists
and women who want to do what they want when they want.
You see the reason as to why us Kenyan woman and our fellow
male counterparts are at loggerheads, is because we want them to state their
intentions. While they on the other hand do not want to because we are known to
assume a lot. We are a very conceited lot
that likes to assume we deserve the best of everything. Even though some of us
might be a terrible substitute of what the man actually wants.
Tell a Kenyan woman, or let me just say a woman because it
still applies to any woman; tell her that you would like to be married in the
future and she will assume who better than her to take the place. So she will
run around to do your bidding just because she assumes that you cannot get
better than her or rather you do not deserve better than her.
You as the man cannot tell her that you want or are looking
for a serious relationship because she immediately assumes that it is her you
want. That is when you are looked at badly when you forget an anniversary you
did not even know about. Or a birthday that you did not have time to check on
her Facebook wall and find out about. Or the relationship you are having that you
did not get the memo about. Since she was doing your laundry without you asking
it was up to you to figure out that you were actually in a relationship. So in
the end, as the man, you lose anyways, tell her you are not her boyfriend; you
will get a tantrum. Do not tell her and surprise her with your woman, you will
still get a whooping or a drink in the face.
See ladies, the reason I put that quote up is because that
is how many of you end up being a sh***y lock, because you are getting opened
by too many keys. A man will be a stud, if he plays the field, a woman on the
other hand becomes a * (unladylike word) if she does the same. The thing is
most of you end up in that kind of situation gradually and unknowingly as
compared to the men.
Men are allowed to play the field, but they do it at the
same time while looking for that one lock that is yet to be played by the whole
arena. You might have been it, but as you attempt to go after every boy.
That crosses your path you end up losing on the master keys.
As much as we like touting about equal rights that is one place we will never
win especially if you are looking for a good man’s compliance for a long-term
It is allowed to want to be single and to spend the rest of
your life alone. It is also allowed to want to have a companion but how you go
about choosing that companion is what matters. Do not chase after every boy,
not man, and render yourself a bad lock. It is not that the men do not want
commitment, just that when he is looking, he gives himself time to observe and
watch how you behave.
Not living within your means, telling him how he is not good
enough to fit the shoes you chose for him, and over reaching in everything in
his life yet you are not up to standard. That is how you get cast in roles you
did not audition for; the ‘one night stand, the date, the side chick, the
mother of his child not good enough to be a wife, and men can friend zone too
you know’ the list is endless. Thing is when a man puts you in a particular
category, you cannot get out of it. The
worst category is usually the friends with benefits; do not cheat yourself
that you can become a girlfriend if only you agree to this. In his way of
thinking, what you do or did with him, you must have done or do with other
people too; making you a faulty lock.
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