Does role-playing improve sex?
30 October 2014, 12:48
Nairobi - In a bid to improve their sex lives a couple may agree to do
a bit of role playing (Imagining having sex with some fantasy like Beyonce or Brad Pitt). It may be good but it may also signal a bad turn in a
relationship. A few things to look out for when figuring
out if the role-playing in your relationship is just not working.
If only one of you
come up with the idea
If only one of you keeps pushing the other partner for it;
then it is not good. It should be something both people agree on. Both partners
should want to participate. Coercing the other only looks like you are bored
When it is only one character
Role playing is not
about just having one individual or character in one’s head. If your partner
insists on you playing only this one person then alarm bells should start
ringing in your head. Because what it
says is that they just want them and not you. So you just represent what they
cannot have. Good role-playing involves a lot of inter-changing.
Read also: Sexual satisfaction to die for
It should not be something that defines your sex lives
A little even a lot
of experimenting is good but when you choose this as a focus it only leads to a
downward spiral in your relationship. If you have to keep doing it every time
you are intimate with each other, maybe what you need to worry about is that
you really do not want to be intimate with each other.
Sometimes it is just not about role-playing
Maybe it’s just that
your partner wants you to act differently during sex but they do not know how
to communicate this. Role playing might just be an effort in trying to
communicate something else that they want from you. Especially if they come up
with a certain character. Tread carefully though as it might sound offensive
when you are on the receiving end.
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