Create Profile

Creating your profile will enable you to submit photos and stories to get published on News24.

Please provide a username for your profile page:

This username must be unique, cannot be edited and will be used in the URL to your profile page across the entire 24.com network.

Facebook Sign-In

Hi News addict,

Join the News24 Community to be involved in breaking the news.

Log in with Facebook to comment and personalise news, weather and listings.


MyNews24 is a user-generated section of News24 Kenya. The stories here come from users.

Latest Badges:

View all Bernard Lugagah's badges.

8 tips to salvage a conversation gone bad

16 July 2016, 09:23 Bernard Lugagah

Nairobi - Conversations are the building blocks of relationships. Face to face, on phone through social media… The more you talk the better.

In fact, a bad conversation is better than no conversation, contrary to the popular misconception that speech is silver and silence is golden. Silence is only golden if it is part of a conversation, working to enhance rather than avoid it.

The trick is to know how to take charge of a runaway conversation and guide it to fruition; the aim always is to influence the other person to your side.

And you can, if only you keep your head and follow these 8 tips, just don’t stop talking. (Ok, from time to time, you need to stop to draw in a breath, you know)

Know Thyself

Even though you may not realise it, other people may be quite adept at reading your pressure points. They may know just what to say to get you off your rockers. Beat them to it, and when they attempt to exploit those buttons react uncharacteristically. Rather than being annoyed, take it in good grace, smile and say how much you care about them.

Recast in better light.

Rephrase whatever the other person in positive light. If he says you are having an argument, politely inform him that it is a discussion. This allows for civility and listening and  limits his choices to only positive reactions. It also makes him feel bad for being argumentative in a discussion. Nobody wants to be bad.

Be Good.

Nairobi - Don’t let the other person portray you in negative light. Change their characterization of you into an admirable quality. Don’t let them get away with calling you ‘a stubborn know it all’. Remind them that you are a persistent person passionate about the subject. And also that it is not an argument, it is a discussion. In case they have forgotten.

Call on History

Use a past shared experience that helped get you through before. This alerts the other person that things are not going well and that you are actually good people stuck with a bad subject.  It reminds them that your relationship is bigger than your disagreement and that you shall overcome.


Asking questions allows the other person to really think about what they are saying and cools them down. Most important it gives you an opportunity to understand what the other person is really about, and how to address their concerns. You may find you are assuming more than is actually said.

Start Right.

A job well begun is a job half done. If you anticipate a disagreement later on, start positively. Make as many concessions as you can, and draw attention to this as you confront the thorny issue. “So far we have agreed on over two thirds of our concerns, it only remains this…” It should work.

Don’t Surrender your Power.

Be confident about your contribution. Politely correct misconceptions as they arise.


If it is getting out of hand uncontrollably, beat a hasty retreat and try another day. Don’t kill it now by persisting, leave it for another day.

Thus says the man yet to win an argument.

- MyNews24

Disclaimer: All articles and letters published on MyNews24 have been independently written by members of News24's community. The views of users published on News24 are therefore their own and do not necessarily represent the views of News24. News24 editors also reserve the right to edit or delete any and all comments received.

Read more from our Users

Submitted by
Wilwon Ochieng
Deputy Governor's ally found with...

The EACC has recovered KES 2 million in fake currency from a close ally of Deputy Governor for Tharaka Nithi Eliud Mati. Read more...

Submitted by
William Korir
Mudavadi given permission to join...

Musalia Mudavadi has been ghranted permission by his party to join the CORD Coalition. Read more...

Submitted by
Victor Tinto
EACC officers raid Deputy Governo...

EACC officers raided the home of a Deputy Governor as theft case continues in court. Read more...

Submitted by
Wilson Ochieng
New IEBC bosses to be named Novem...

New IEBC bosses will be named on November 30. Read more...

Submitted by
William Korir
DP Ruto has spoilt my name, activ...

DP William Ruto has spoilt my name, activist complains. Read more...

Submitted by
Wilson Ochieng
Apologise for attack on Auditor G...

Apologise for attack on Auditor General, President Uhuru Kenyatta is told by Kisumu Senator Anyang Nyong'o. Read more...