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7 reasons why men prefer the village girl

03 March 2015, 14:43 Shakila Alivitsa

Nairobi - Since men are complaining that the women from Nairobi are not good enough to be wives, I decided to do a solid for the girls back in the village.

Your mother has also noticed that the women you take back to her at home are at odds with the three stone cooker. They cry from the smoke, waste paraffin by using it to light the fire or forget to tend to the fire and thus spoil a number of foods from the fires that eventually burn out. But not to worry, she has found the girl just for you. You really should consider her because with me I have a list of a lot of pros that you can gain from marrying her and just a few cons that do not really matter.

She does not need designer outfits, manicures and the Arabian horse’s tail on her head

The girl from the village will not ruin your financial budget by making demands for what she does not know of. Her hair is good enough plaited in lines and the odd braids at Christmas that will save you a monthly of KES 2000 at least for braids. She is yet to know about hair extensions, thus saving you the dreaded KES 450,000. I doubt she can pronounce Giorgio Arman or Louboutin, so you are good as far as they are concerned. The exhibition will work for her saving you thousands of shillings per year. She does not need to go to the spa because I doubt she will appreciate some stranger kneading her body and feet, or allow some fish to eat her legs.

She knows how to cook like your mother (or close)

She has grown up learning from the women folk in the village, and if you are also from the village you know she has been taught by the best on traditional fare. You will never spend a night hungry from burnt food or have to run to the fast food restaurants for fries and burgers.

She is a cheap date

The Villa Rosa Kempinski, Tribe Hotel, Sankara; what are those? If she has heard of them she probably does not think they are in this humble country. She makes a cheap date because the idea of eating raw fish is repugnant to her. She cannot tell the salad fork from the fish one so taking her there only daunts her. She would rather just have chicken and chips from Kenchic-she has just saved you over KES 3000 a plate and that is without drinks. Valentines? Birthdays? The rose will work just fine and she cooks for you the meal with the grocery you bought for her. You lucky man.

She is a cheap household manageress

Who cannot appreciate a woman who can light a fire at your backyard in case the lights go out and the cooker does not work? Or a woman who does not have to keep using the kettle for boiling water or forgets about the television in the living room. In such a situation, your tokens will last a lifetime.

She will not fight with you over the remote

You know us girls from Nairobi, how we want to have DStv and watch the Kardashians or the latest trends on Fashion TV and listen to loud music courtesy of Channel O.  We will not even allow you to watch your game. The girl from the rural area will not know how to operate the remote. If you show her and later you want to watch the game while she wants to watch Vitimbi; you just put the child lock on and she will be none the wiser on your tricks.

What is feminism?

She knows her place and will not argue with you over chores. She will not bother you with questions of where you are going. The way she sees it at least you do not spent the day at a chang’aa den –she hit the jackpot on the husband stakes.

She does not want you cooking for her because it is shameful as it is a sign her food is not good enough.

But beware, she does have her cons too

If you get a woman from the village and you do not want her mindset to change, then you are setting yourself up. First of all, unless you do not want to amount to anything and not be promoted beyond a ground worker. Who will be your hostess? A CEO needs a woman who will be able to host any dinners that he organizes or functions that the family presides over. If you are realistic we both know she will lack the polish to do so.

Chances are you will also be setting yourself up to get another side chick that will be your trophy. The one that you can show off or go to events with because truth be told you will be embarrassed of your village girl.

When she gets her rs and lwrong, her conversation will start grating on your nerves and you will be wishing for duct tape for her mouth.

Then last but not least, we all know men are visual, so let us see how sexy and chic she will be with her Ngoma shoes and weed scarf.

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