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6 things to discuss when going for a first date

21 April 2016, 20:30 Shakila Alivitsa

Nairobi - It is okay to want your hand held while dating as well. There is a reason why your last date never called you, blocked your number or keeps sending you to voice mail. Maybe you have no filter or maybe, just maybe you went above and beyond on your topics of conversation. Someone is laughing because they think they have got ‘this’. No, you do not have this and maybe that is why you are single.

Don’t talk about your child/ children on your first date

It is not lying but giving someone the opportunity to get to know you before you drop that bombshell. We all know some people choose to hide this fact and that is because not many people are okay with seeing someone with children or even one child. So let someone get to know you and maybe on the second or third date is when you let them know. Otherwise, the minute you spill that one it will take center stage the whole date. It will no longer be about you.

Your religious and political views are a no-no

Just find something else to talk about. If it looks like it is heading that direction, bring it back. Don’t talk about Ruto, don’t talk about Sang, and don’t talk about the Ocampo six and your frustration with corruption, the NYS scandal and the Eurobond. Save that debate for a later date, like when you want to look for reasons the two of you are not a match.

You can talk about your work

If you have a boring job and do not enjoy what you do, I can see how you would bore someone to death while talking about it. If your job is tedious, then talk about something you enjoy doing on your spare time like volunteering. Question them about theirs and be interested in actually wanting to know. Don’t ask but your face is concentrating on the next table and what they are doing. Don’t put down a profession and say why you would have never done it-you might find out it is what they do.

What music do you enjoy listening to?

‘What music do you enjoy listening to?’ ‘Hmmmm, I don’t know. I listen to everything.’ That is me but I bet you, if I am sitting across someone cultured I will talk about the classics, Ludwig van Beethoven, Frederic Chopin and how they make me emotional and inspire creativity. Don’t say you like ‘Bendover’ and raga. I was watching Tujuane and that was one woman’s answer. The man while being interviewed on the side just said how he would never date her but he is keeping her around until she introduces him to her friends so that he can date them. Just don’t say ‘Bendover’ and Sean Paul on a date.

What do you like doing on your free time?

You do not have to lie if on weekends you are mostly in bed with a book or sleeping. Not everyone likes mucking around in mud when it is raining. Just be honest. They will ask you to invite them out to something and you will be clueless. If they want they can invite you but don’t draw a false picture so that someone does not think you are boring. If they think you are boring for not wanting to get rained on and saving money, then they are still too much of a child. They are not the one for you.

Don’t take things too seriously

There is this time I went to someone’s office and he had these fancy chairs. You know if you have a big behind, you just deposit yourself on anything because you are sure it will manage the stability. I have this bad habit of sitting first and using my behind to move forward. The ladies know what I am talking about. So this time, the fancy chairs were nearly my undoing. I nearly fell off because the sit moved backwards. Luckily, the man was not paying attention to what I was doing so while I was fighting with his desk and chair I managed to pick myself really fast before he noticed. Or maybe he noticed because you know how men like pretending.

The point is, you can have such moments while out on a date, you can fall, spill something or maybe your date spills something on you. You do not have to over react. Just be relaxed and have a good time. It is just a dress and if you fall, you better laugh because you look less stupid.

- MyNews24

Disclaimer: All articles and letters published on MyNews24 have been independently written by members of News24's community. The views of users published on News24 are therefore their own and do not necessarily represent the views of News24. News24 editors also reserve the right to edit or delete any and all comments received.

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