6 things a woman should never apologize for
21 July 2015, 18:28
Nairobi - A woman should never apologize for wanting to be herself.
The career you have
worked hard to make immaculate
It is no one’s business if you do not have an active social
life, if that is not what you want. If you have worked hard to make your
career, work and business that successful that the rest of everybody else has
to look for needles to cushion on your back, that is their business and not
yours. You should not feel bad that you had a goal in mind and made it happen.
It is yours so own it.
I applaud any woman who makes that makes the rest of us
wonder and even doubt that we are actually doing enough. If you are honest
enough with yourself she is the reason that makes you wake up that day you want
to sleep in. She is the one that is always at the back of your mind when you
try to make a success of the little that you have. When one woman is up there,
one thing I admire about the rest of us is that we will work harder to dethrone
her; that is just how we work. We have her to thank for making us push harder.
Wanting the best man
On the subject of men and being in a relationship with them,
I have never been against it. I am pro-procreation and living in blissful
harmony. Just because all your girlfriends are pledging singledom it does not
mean you have to do the same if that is not what you want. If they do not
support your ideas then you are in the wrong club.
In the same, not wanting to settle and waiting for the right
man for you is not a bad thing as long as you have your mind right. You will
save yourself from jumping in dysfunctional relationship and a load of hurt
they do cause. Do not feel the need to apologize to your friends, parents and
church group because you have a clear idea on who your husband is.
Not just to sex with a man that you do not want. Or to a
relationship with a man that is not right for you. It also applies to work and
to a career that your mind is not really in. At times you get a job-maybe it
was a referral or your mother and husband do not think what you are doing is
good enough so they went to get you ‘something better’. If you do not say no
now, you will end up embarrassing them with shoddy work, poor input and output,
no passion in what you are doing and generally; poor work.
If you already know in your mind that something is not going
to work for you, then say it and save everybody else involved the grief. It
does not look good now, but they will get over it.
I am not saying go out there and be a wh*** or a sl**, sleep
with many men or go out of your way to be a neon light. Sexuality is just you
being feminine and knowing how well you can and should carry it. There is a
difference between tight and fitting. A difference between subtle cleavage and
aggressive cleavage. The right length as compared to no length to even speak
of. There is nothing wrong with telling your man what you want or expect
sexually. If he does not agree then at least you know that he was not
compatible; save yourself that cheating disaster.
Also for every one man that makes you feel ashamed about how
you dress and carry yourself, two more women will make you feel worse. There is
always someone who has a problem with someone else. But as long as you know
your place and you know the right way, there is nothing you should be ashamed
Getting money, getting
paid, getting big cheques
For every man that supports the empowerment of women there
is another feeling a negative type of way about it. Most of the time it is the
one that is closest to her.
Being able to stand on your own two feet and taking care of
your bills as well as those of your aging parents as well as children is not
something to be embarrassed about. Or something that someone should make you
feel unfeminine about. A husband who tells a wife to quit her job because it
pays more than his is using faulty binoculars. Do not be overly worried about
causing tension just go buy better spectacles for him in the name of
development in your life and he will come around. It can never be pressed
enough on how women who follow that directive (from the husband) later
Being confident in you
It is not something you learn everyday but it is something
women are constantly learning in some part of their life. She might be
confident in her work but her look is not right to her. Her looks can be okay
but she is not good with men.
There is no embarrassment in admitting you were not or are
not good at something-but I will advise in work, and career; fake it, fake it
and fake it again until it pans out. That is the only way anyone will ever
trust you with their money. So what you have now, make it work and be confident
in it until you convince everybody else that you are the best.
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