5 ways to deal with your mother in-law
27 October 2015, 16:22
Nairobi - First try to think of her as your own mother, then think of
her as a very troublesome client that you have to run a very successful ad
Don’t have a problem with a son taking care of the mother
Not very many parents can support themselves after they stop
working in old age. Savings get depleted and that is when someone has to take
over; the child. You cannot keep having an argument with your husband about him
taking care of the mother because she will know. That causes a bigger rift
between the two of you. She might have given it a chance in the long run but
money issues never get solved especially if it is a need. So every time he
spends, you get mad and she gets mad at you because you have an issue with it.
Let it go because you cannot stop it, you can manage it but you cannot keep
trying to cut off someone’s mother.
It is not the moment to point out all her faults just
because she mentions one of yours
Old people are petty. I don’t know if it is because they now
realize they have less time on earth so they choose to annoy the ones who will
be left behind. Mothers in law are worse because now she has time to be in her
son’s business when she comes to visit. You can only choose what you pay attention
to. She does not like how you cook, get over it. She does not like how you
look; she will get over it eventually. You cannot keep running to her son with
such pettiness. She will stop when she sees you pay her no mind but let her
know that it gets to you, it will never stop!
Consider doing things just the two of you and not because
the son had to go visit
Check on her, ask after her, and make the effort to involve
her in what you are doing. Not because your husband asked you to but because
you just want to. That is how you turn it around. She sees that you are
actually interested and not because her son forced you. If you make the effort
and she does not relent then it is not you with the problem. At least you
You can have disagreements but keep them at a bare minimum
You do not have to pick everything apart to show that she is
the cause of all your problems or disagreements. If it can be ignored then
ignore it because old people can be petty because they are just old. Leave the
arguments for the things that actually matter like interference with how you
raise your child not her wanting to eat something different from everyone else.
Look at it this way, choose the latter argument and what will happen is that
the son, your husband might end up in the kitchen trying to make his mother
happy. Or you will end up doing it to diffuse a ‘situation’ either way, it will
Your husband’s siblings also matter
Just because they are her children. Have an issue with one
of them, you have one with her. I know family can be annoying. All I can tell
you is that you will just have to try to get along especially if she is around.
Don’t talk badly about one or try to tell her what another did. She will
welcome the gossip but she will start to think that is what you tell other
people about her children.
For the latest on national news, politics, sport, entertainment and more follow us on Twitter and like our Facebook page!
Disclaimer: All articles and letters published on MyNews24 have been independently written by members of News24's community. The views of users published on News24 are therefore their own and do not necessarily represent the views of News24. News24 editors also reserve the right to edit or delete any and all comments received.