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5 things to do when he proposes

24 April 2015, 15:25 Shakila Alivitsa

Nairobi - When you are out here in the jungle dating people, being in relationships and being exclusive with that one person whilst shunning all the others, what is the happiest day of a woman’s life?

When he pops that elusive question that keeps you awake all night, reminding you of the days you used to stay up cramming for exams. That is your joyous moment as ‘his’ woman. You are yet to be his completely until you get that certificate.

You have proved to yourself and to him that you are better than the others or, he just could not wait for Keisha to break up with Tom so that he could swoop in and cast odes to her on his undying love and timeless devotion.

What is the first thing that you as a woman do after you get the ring?

Call all your friends and inform them of this joyous moment

Not because you want them to share in it but because 1. You call the single one’s first to rub it in that you no longer run in their crowds and you beat them to it, and 2. You call the married ones who also rubbed it in your face when they got engaged before you. Just to prove yours was around the corner.

You will use social media as your first official invitation card

You will post on Facebook so that everyone knows your man proposed while the others are still lacking a man. You will take a picture of the ring (if you got one) so that you can show how many carats you got or in some instances a plain band. You will also tweet how happy you are and you can no longer need to worry that you appear thirsty on people’s DMs.

Then you will remember to tell your parents

When they did not even know you were in a relationship. You did not want to raise any false hopes because at the back of your mind you knew that he was not 100% in.

They did not know that when you moved out you were involved in some come we stay type of situation your mother was praying against.

Then everyone asks how he did it?

Was it on a bended knee? Took you on a trip and propose by the ocean or was it at Uhuru Gardens in a boat. Or that fancy restaurant that you wanted but it did not pan out that way.

All, okay…most women daydream about how they would like the man that they are with to propose to them. If he is not in terms with your best friend, chances are you will get the short end of the uuuuh…stick-let’s call it stick. Other times for him, it is just as simple as doing it while you are eating that Ugali and Sukuma wiki whilst Kenya Power plays trick or treat on that weekday. While you are stuffed with Ugali, he pops that question. I think white lies were invented by some woman because we both know that that is not the story your friends will hear. You did not like the proposal, but you are happy that at least now you have the ring.

When you are proposed to, the first person or people who should hear about it is not your friends but your parents. They are the only people who will give you an honest opinion and expression. That is what you want not false flattery. It is also them who will actually share that joy with you because it is also a day that they dream of us well-both the mother and the father.

No need to post it on social media, your business should always be your business not a global transaction

The friends should be told together over lunch or coffee. You know how it is with women, one friend thinks she is better than the other. Or above the other. Whichever one you tell first, there is someone in the group she will call to tell your news to. Be the one to deliver it so that there is no mis- communication and twisted details.

Do not start planning a wedding. An engagement is when you start actually testing each other as a married couple. Do not start booking a church, afew days in, you both get overwhelmed and you pull out. Let it simmer for a minute but set a timeline. Do not let someone use you as a placeholder while still hoping for Keisha to come around.

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Disclaimer: All articles and letters published on MyNews24 have been independently written by members of News24's community. The views of users published on News24 are therefore their own and do not necessarily represent the views of News24. News24 editors also reserve the right to edit or delete any and all comments received.

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