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5 signs of relationship desperation

17 August 2015, 19:09 Shakila Alivitsa

Nairobi - Relationships are not easy. Desperation in relationships is though.

Over texting even when they have not replied

You sent the first text. You wait for them to reply. They don’t. Then you keep checking your phone very few minutes so you start wondering if maybe your phone has a problem. You dismember it then put it back on. Then you send a couple of other texts asking them if they are getting your texts. They still do not reply.

Maybe they just got caught up in something or they just do not have anything to say. Wait. Sending a profusion of texts and forcing them into a reply makes you look bad. If they do not reply, then it is no longer your problem. The ball is in their court.

Confessing feelings even without having created the right kind of attraction

Because you want to be in a relationship so bad, you get so over-excited after the first couple of encounters. Maybe you already had sex on the first date and now they went quiet/. So you start wondering if you gave ‘it’ up too easily and way to fast. Or you are in the friend zone and you are running out of time. Having feels for someone who you are not yet sure of shows them your insecurities and that makes you distasteful if they are not yet there with you yet.

It will also make them uncomfortable and not make them want to be around you.

Showing up unannounced

‘Hi, I was in the neighborhood and I decide to say hi!’ Can we have lunch or you made that lunch and brought it with you. Showing up at someone’ place of work or house unannounced is a bad look and it makes them uncomfortable because now they either have to lie to avoid you or force themselves into the situation you have brought around. Take a pick but either way, you may not be well received unless they have that strong attraction and affection for you.

Making future plans

Planning a future with someone or for someone you are on a second date with is never a good look. You already know you look desperate and needy. If you asked for this date, let them set up the next one. If they do not, then you are priority on their list. That should serve as a sign for you to have other people to see so that if they let you down you do not get broken down.

Hinging on exclusivity way too early

‘What are we?’ the two most dreaded words uttered to people who were caught off-guard. Either you had sex early and think it is a done deal. A couple of dates does not mean you are going somewhere. You are going somewhere only if you are their top priority. You are running the race each with each other and at the same pace. That is when you ask, ‘what are we?’ At times you will not even need to ask because you will know.

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Disclaimer: All articles and letters published on MyNews24 have been independently written by members of News24's community. The views of users published on News24 are therefore their own and do not necessarily represent the views of News24. News24 editors also reserve the right to edit or delete any and all comments received.

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