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5 reasons to avoid affairs

21 October 2015, 13:37 Shakila Alivitsa

Nairobi - New age marriage solutions do not include talking to your partner, going to therapy or making what you already have work. You just go and find yourself another relationship or divorce and marry again. It has become that easy to not take things seriously; but what about an affair?

At times someone is just too lazy to disrupt their lives and decide, I can add another person to this equation and it is less messy.

You take time away from spending with your family to be with the other person

You are thinking, it is the weekend so the kids rarely come out of their rooms and my spouse is busy with work, church or is just never concerned. Fact of the matter is that you should put the same amount of effort to interact with your family as you put to interact with ‘that other person’

You are not aware of what they are up to when you are not with them

You might think you do, but you don’t. The number one rule of cheating: if they are doing it with you, they are, will do it with someone else. That enters all manner of diseases that you will force your unwitting partner to contract. They will now have to carry a burden with you they did not take part in making a decision about.

More funds out of your pocket

You spend money with them that would have otherwise gone into something else; like your family. They cannot lack because you want to have a little fun. Have your little fun but let it not be at their (your family) expense in any way.

Living a double life is so hard, one will have to lose and most times the important one

Your children will never understand you or why you did it. Your fun will cost you your relationship with your children because a betrayal to one parent is felt by them too. If you are willing to lose that then do go ahead with whatever you are doing. A relationship with a spouse never recovers, as much as you would like to think it has repaired.

There is affair then there are affairs

There is a difference. Affair means a lot of things; bad time in your life and you slipped. You actually thought that that person was very important to you when your spouse was not there for you. I am not saying it is allowed but you can be saved.

The other one, affairs, means you are mentally unstable. You get off the high of 2 minutes, get bored then jump to the next one. Not because of bad timing, needing someone or being in a bad place but because you use it as a drug and that is abusive to your partner. They should live you in my opinion.

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