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5 reasons dating 'fixers' does not work

31 August 2016, 13:15 Shakila Alivitsa

Nairobi - There is a difference between wanting someone to do better and wanting them to do better your way. The latter is what a fixer is.

No one likes a fixer. Anyone will put up a resistance against someone who comes in to tell them how to do what they are doing, but wait, they will do it better than you.

Fixers are persistent which makes them annoying

They do not know when to take a no for an answer because there is always a but in the end of their sentence. They will keep nagging you about something until you either agree to it or they force you into it.

They rarely make it about your personal growth but because they are in a relationship with you

For example, they meet you at an event. You are clearly an artist; maybe you are singing or selling some art. You go on dates and they find out you might have one of those technical degrees like architecture, surgery or basically something that could earn you more than what you are currently doing. In their head, it is now how much of a better life style they could live or…sorry, you could live if only you would pursue that and stop depending on your passions alone. Now, do you get it?

Fixers in relationships don’t know how to mind their business

Of course, most couples like being in each other’s business but we all have limits. They don’t because what you do directly affects them. If it is business, they want to know how much it will earn compared to how much will go down the drain even if it is your money. If it is a change of job, will it make your lives better or you are about to cut off some expenses due to lower pay. Is it going to affect their social life? Will it embarrass them?

They are obsessed with making things perfect

Basically all the above with a little more intense nagging and making sure you slip up. One small mistake on your part or failure will have them harping on your head all through the relationship. ‘Remember that one time you….’

It is not limited to you but everyone in your circle

They are the ones when you bring to a gathering has a proposal ready, ‘You guys will do so much better if you stopped drinking all weekend and saved your money instead.’

‘I think this is a good idea for you guys.’ Even though you do not mix business with friends or family. As long as they are doing it, we are all doing it.

- MyNews24

Disclaimer: All articles and letters published on MyNews24 have been independently written by members of News24's community. The views of users published on News24 are therefore their own and do not necessarily represent the views of News24. News24 editors also reserve the right to edit or delete any and all comments received.

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