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4 traits that make a gentleman

13 January 2015, 14:53 Shakila Alivitsa

Nairobi - So what makes someone a gentleman? I would not know because most of the descriptions I have had are from something I have read, or have been told, not yet seen though. I have not had my chair pulled out for me, I do not know why but maybe it is because some of the restaurants I go to have couches and it is quite tricky for the man to figure out how to pull that one out. Yet I have gone on some dates with regular seats, even with the ex, and no, no chairs were pulled out.

I sometimes catch myself opening the door while everybody else went through including the men, so that technically makes me a gentle lady.

Complaints about Kenyan men by the women mostly feature them being not gentleman enough. I do not think that these women are asking for much like putting your coat down in a mud puddle or letting her walk all over you. There is a difference in how you do your things that define you as a gentleman and being unchivalrous.

Having manners...

For one thing, it is good to escort a woman home especially if you know she lives in a tough neighborhood, Nairobi is full of those. It is another thing to want to escort her home so that she can invite you in for a late night so that you can tuck her in.

Opening doors and giving up a seat is not at your leisure...

Men pucker up when a beautiful woman passes them and they climb over each other just to get her attention. Picture this situation, as you are running to make it to the office, a woman walks by you, very beautiful, you rush to open the door for her, she smiles and soon forgets about you as you run after her to make an introduction letting the door close in your colleague’s face just because she does not make the cut in your books. That is not being a gentleman.

Same applies to seats, sometimes you see an old lady standing yet a grown man is seated because he can be less bothered about her.

Gentlemen are not self-entitled...

If you work hard, it is good to expect respect from everyone else but also have gratitude for what you were able to get. Not all women will bend over backwards for you, if they do then you are with the wrong women. There is a yin and yang between cockiness and confidence.

Be honest...

Pride in a man dictates that he should never fall short of what he portrays. Gentlemen do not need to lie, they are upfront and that is a major grievance that most Kenyan women have with their men. They are always up to something and very deceitful about it.


It is good that you have made it, but no one will always roll out a red carpet for you and wave flags in your honor. One who works hard, is not afraid to get his hands dirty and maintain respect for all has something to admire in him.



- MyNews24

Disclaimer: All articles and letters published on MyNews24 have been independently written by members of News24's community. The views of users published on News24 are therefore their own and do not necessarily represent the views of News24. News24 editors also reserve the right to edit or delete any and all comments received.

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