4 times not to talk about sex
12 August 2015, 14:37
You should not talk about sex all the time. Here's 4 times you should never do so.
Before, During or After Sex
If you are talking about sex with your partner, we are
hoping it is because you are hoping for a positive outcome.
It is also important to note that timing is a crucial part.
I am not saying that you organize a conference or tell someone ‘we are having
the talk!’ No.
Before sex and they will go in with anxiety or bitterness
because they are thinking you were doing okay for you to crumble their walls.
The only time you should talk during sex is when you are giving positive
reinforcement or positive redirection; otherwise it is not the time to tap
someone and the shoulder and be like, ‘yea, I have been wanting to let you know
that that never works for me.’ After sex and it will be like you are marking an
exam paper. Unless you passed all your exams you will understand this.
When they clearly have something else on their mind
Contrary to popular belief that sex is the answer to solving
everything in a relationship, there are other things to think about for each
individual in that relationship. This is when the concept of space can be
applied. You will know and some of you know when your partner is going through
something but chose to ignore the moment. It does not matter if they are staring
off into space but it is clear they have something on their mind. It may be
work, school or crazy relatives and ailing parents. That is not the time to
think of re-evaluating your bedroom activities. Even if you are thinking it is
killing two birds with one stone because that is how most couples think.
‘Since we are solving
a problem now, let me add on this one and we solve all of them now.’ That is
not nice. You will be showing them that you came in with an underhand agenda
and not for them solely.
When they are ailing
Nothing looks better than a partner who will not shout back
at you or argue with you when you want to have a discussion with them. That is
why most people like ‘discussing’ things when the person they are discussing it
with is on the sickbed. It is not the time to hand out your sexual grievances
even if you are in the bedroom. Wait for them to get better so they have the
energy to fight with you about it.
When ED pops up
Erectile dysfunction. It pops up unexpectedly and at times
when you least expect it. Even being stressed can cause it. It is not the end
of the world but because you are confronting that, does not mean you bring up
your grievances there and then. There are many ways to kill a cat and you might
do it without being aware.
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