4 things to consider when dating a rich man
27 March 2015, 18:38
Nairobi - Someone once told me that the rich marry the rich and the poor marry the poor. I was still tender in my head those days so I agreed whole heartedly because I knew Paris Hilton was not coming to Kenya and marrying some cobbler. I was looking at it in the celebrity billionaire perspective. But today, it finally hit me, the rich do marry the rich and the poor the same and it is because of some very strong reasons. This is when you actually realize that at times love cannot break some barriers.
Sometime last year we saw the drama of the Bukusu man and his Indian woman who did not last in the Bungoma jungle. We can also be sure it was not because she did not cook Ugali well or because she had just moved herself from a well plastered house to a mud hut. That is none of my business. Thing is the relationship did not last.
It is not just about money but the culture, views, circles that is miles apart.
It is true, well moneyed people do things differently as compared to the rest of us. They eat differently, live differently, relax differently, they even sit differently.
I cannot see the man being the one to downsize but women are the ones who get foolish notions in their heads in the name of love. I can imagine that Bukusu man’s lover had never spent a night in such a dark lit area. I am also sure she had yet to envision treks to the village river just to fetch water and wash clothes. It is easier for the woman to adapt to a rich lifestyle as compared to adapting to a poor man’s lifestyle.Let us not even go into cooking Ugali for the entire homestead.
Let us imagine dinner tables set with three plates and more than five cutlery for one person’s setting. Let us imagine the love of someone’s life who has relocated from a dingy area in some village trying to mingle with the who’s who’s from her lover’s circle. It spells disaster. This can only go two ways. Either someone will not be accompanying the other to social functions as someone is embarrassed of them or they will have to get a coach or consultant to teach an old dog new tricks.
Money can buy a lot of things but it cannot buy heritage or poise that comes with being born on the right side of this Kenya.
It will ruin the relationship. If someone was rich and they are now adapting to being poor, at first they will be open minded. Soon enough when things no longer come easy or are done for you, you make life miserable for the person you chose that life for. You resent them because they cannot get you the lifestyle that you had. In no time, misery sets in and you start wondering if you had made the right decision.
On the other hand, think of the poor moving into the rich lifestyle. Lifetime habits are hard to break. A mindset is even harder to cure. If the poor person always scrimped and struggled to make end meet, it will be hard for them to spend. They will always hoard out of fear of losing it as quick as they got it. So maybe if you are a rich spender, just marry a poor person, they will help you save.
Acceptance from your partner’s association
It is harder for a poor person to be accepted into a rich person’s circle. They will always look down their nose at you. It can also be hard for a rich person to be accepted by the poor person’s people. Believe it or not poor Kenyans who are slumming it scorn on the rich. They see their hard work as the cushioning for what you have. Also you might just have stolen it from them. Does not matter if you buy them something now or give them anything, the fact that you seem like you got it on a silver platter is a grievance.
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