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4 signs your relationship is out of control

16 February 2016, 13:38 Shakila Alivitsa

Nairobi - Control is not when you completely dominate your partner or shout louder in order for them to scramble and do your bidding. Control is not when you can’t speak against your partner because you are afraid of them or their ensuing action. These are the wrong types of control in a relationship where one person stays because they feel indebted to another person or they cannot do better so they put up with whatever.

You over-compensate

Only one person is continuously gaining in the relationship and it is not you. You keep rushing to fulfill the other party’s demands. You don’t even have discussions on compromise but you just do because you do not want them to leave or you are afraid of them leaving you for someone else.

You cannot speak your mind in the relationship

A person who has no control in their relationship cannot speak up against their partner. They just agree with everything either to avoid a big blow out or not get too confrontational because they are always loosing. They do not want to suffer any silent treatment from the other partner because that is what usually happens. The other partner always gets their way and it is because of how they always react whenever something happens.

Using manipulation to get your way

In order for something to happen for you, something drastic also has to give.  You either sulk or ignore them in order for them to give in. You have to cry to win any arguments. There is silent treatment if they do not give in and they have to reward you to get back to your good graces. If this keeps happening in your relationship, it is on a short leash and it will eventually snap.

Your partner easily threatens you

You are not secure in a relationship with the other person. They are constantly reminding you of who they can leave you for because they want them.  They tell you if you do not do this, they will go out and do it with someone else or someone else will easily do it for them. Basically; what you will not do, they do not hesitate to remind you they have someone in line waiting to do it. So you do it because you do not want to be relationship-less.

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Disclaimer: All articles and letters published on MyNews24 have been independently written by members of News24's community. The views of users published on News24 are therefore their own and do not necessarily represent the views of News24. News24 editors also reserve the right to edit or delete any and all comments received.

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