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4 signs you are forcing a relationship

06 January 2016, 12:52 Shakila Alivitsa

Nairobi - Are you forcing a relationship?

If you have to keep giving ultimatums, you are forcing it

Having to bark orders every time you need something in order for them to stop and ask what you need. They can just never do it because they want to or chose to but because you have to keep scolding them for them to do it. For example dates, if you want to go somewhere you have to ask and keep reminding them so that they do not forget about you in their ‘busy’ schedule. You have to keep bringing up past issues to justify your current situation. Your relationship is more like one person is being pulled by the other all the time.

If there is an acceptable explanation for every disappointment then you are forcing it

You help them come up with an excuse every time they mess up or disappoint you. They are late for dinner because the workload has gotten bigger for them. They cannot make time to see you because they barely have the time so you will just settle for the crumbs when they get around to it. They cannot go to this event with you because they need that rest from a hectic work week. Until you even just stop asking but are more satisfied with the idea of being in a relationship other than breaking it off and waiting for someone who will give you what you need.

You have to create a situation for them to pay attention

A forced relationship is a one –sided relationship; meaning that unless you pinch the other person and remind them that you are around they will barely take notice. Your tantrums, scolding or drama is the only way you can get a reaction out of them where you are concerned. That is not a relationship you should appreciate being in but be worried of what is making you do.

You are always playing catch up to their pace

If they feel like doing it, they will. If they do not feel like doing it, they won’t and at the end of the day they could care less if they informed you or not. You are the one that has to keep asking about plans, calling to check on them and what they are doing. You get the picture. This is the equivalent of chasing someone who does not care to be caught by you.

You can easily confuse going after what you want with if it is meant to be it will be. You can go after it but if it is blatantly showing you that it does not want it to be you then leave it alone. It is clearly saying it was never meant to be despite you trying to catch it.

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Disclaimer: All articles and letters published on MyNews24 have been independently written by members of News24's community. The views of users published on News24 are therefore their own and do not necessarily represent the views of News24. News24 editors also reserve the right to edit or delete any and all comments received.

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