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4 secrets women keep to themselves

13 April 2015, 17:33 Shakila Alivitsa

Nairobi - I have a friend whom I personally think showed her cards way too early in the relationship. And it actually ended the relationship faster than I can say Budweiser. There are those things we should just keep to yourself up until you have reeled that man in. It is not lying just omitting some information.

The man comes from a well to do background and has it already made. You will understand why he might have that snotty wide African nose up in the air. She on the other hand does not come from such a background. In fact, she just moved to town from that area we call Western where all the ushambaness resides.  He is from another country so he is not that aware of our tribes and their funny habits. Anyway, he knew she was not well to do but he did not know to what extent, a not-well-to-do-coming-from-Western kind of person actually is.

So she took the man her photos, yes she took him photos. That is how we Western people do. Those photos had all the best backgrounds from muddy huts, the color clashing relatives whose hair has not seen a comb and a broken pot or two just to bring around the best effect. After that he shut down. The man just cooled down and the relationship is no more.

I once wrote an article on how the rich marry the rich and it is for reasons such as class and social circles. Which in this case must have been what ran the man the other way. I am sure he just envisioned a life where all those color clashing relatives would visit him in the suburb and cause him embarrassment and decided to call it quits.

True Kenyan ladies do not wash our dirty linen in front of our men up- until he is so hooked he cannot jump back into the water. The things we keep to ourselves

When she has a child staying with mother back in the village

A lot of women had a child or two with a man who did not pan out. Trying to make a living in Nairobi, she left the child at home and she never talks about that child. Appreciate those single mothers in town who flash the cards on the table and tell you what you are in for. Because for others, she waits until you are celebrating your second anniversary in the marriage and tells you that cousin that is staying with mum back at home is not a cousin but her child. The reason she is telling you now is because that is now an extra mouth she needs you to feed.

When she is carrying something or was diagnosed with something

Remember that Russian roulette article I wrote about people not bothering to get their partners tested. You might actually need to get someone tested. Many people do not come clean with their partners. Put it down to your lack of interest because you are too busy trying to get someone in the sack.

You might actually be getting into the sack with other things other than that woman. Other women do not even go to hospital unless they are sick, so they might have a medical condition that they are not aware of.

When it’s not her financing her life

It is not her father either. We all know that the latest trend in Nairobi is dating the older man, and he in exchange sorts you out.

You are over there thinking that you are proud of how your woman can support herself. Maybe you should not be too proud because it might be that old man you and your cronies make jokes about.

If she is a criminal

There is the con artist, the prostitute, the one who has been to jail… Do I dare and continue? Some of you are seeing women who have slept at Langat a Women’s Prisons, let us not even get into why she was there in the first place. Either way, that is none of my business. Who am I to tell you what your woman might be hiding?

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