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4 reasons men pick their wives

02 June 2016, 14:57 Shakila Alivitsa

Nairobi - A man said something interesting today, ‘I kept messing up throughout the whole relationship (They mentioned constant cheating and financial problems.) So every time I did so, she would take me back and I realized that I have to stick with this woman.’

When you listen to it, it sounds really good, like at least this man is doing right by this woman. Until you really think hard about it. In my head it translated differently. He was picking her because she has learnt to deal with it and he knows that no matter what he does, he was scot free. So he was going to have a wife but it was not about being better or trying to do away with the nonsense. He could still do what he wants and he knows she will not leave.

I was so confused, still am.

You know at times you look at some marriages and you are so confused and I think this one will be it. I have never tried to understand a man’s thought processes. This one I did try and I did get it.

He wants the wife that he knows will put up with anything he does

See this one, he has cheated, she is still here. Maybe still planning to cheat because they talked about a lot of prayers and he is not good with money. A man is never too sure of what will happen in the future or what mess he will create. This one went in with the wrong reasons but for the rest, they want to know that if he suddenly loses the job or he is no longer the way you met him-depreciated. He wants to know that you will not leave. That is the definition of through thick and thin.

Some want the women that do not break easily

When they tell you marriage is not for the young at heart, they do not mean age but how emotionally strong are you? You need to handle anything and everything at the drop of a hat. Not the type that runs away every time there is a problem.  Or the one, that starts crying and acting temperamental on the non-issues. You need to be that girlfriend that shows some level of maturity and knows when to react and not when to react. It is not about bickering over everything. That is what is called nagging. (I am not saying theirs were non-issues. That woman is a commando at heart.)

The lady that knows how to handle herself

She is the one that is going to raise the children, maybe even alone. Things happen. He wants to know that even if he is not there, she will get up, dust herself off and do what needs to be done. Not many women are able to do that by the way. If he dies, she is in a deep mess and so are the children.

No man wants to marry a woman that cannot handle his family

This couple was old. They were having a wedding at man: 46, woman:39 . Kenyans have it fixed the other way around. You all rush to marry at a young age with someone you do not really know only for show. Why? People settle down together, live with each other, and raise the kids; then when they are comfortable, have the big wedding; to celebrate their life together and appreciate that they made it work.

Anyway, this couple was old. The point is, the lady had met and dealt with the family. She has learned to accept them.

No man wants to keep running around listening to gossip about what the sister did or why she does not like the mother and has to keep being a referee. 

- MyNews24

Disclaimer: All articles and letters published on MyNews24 have been independently written by members of News24's community. The views of users published on News24 are therefore their own and do not necessarily represent the views of News24. News24 editors also reserve the right to edit or delete any and all comments received.

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