4 reasons I cannot introduce my man to friends
16 March 2016, 21:16
Nairobi - The key word in that whole title is CEMENT. Like when your
friends come and your new man, he should be hooked like a fish-like hook, line and
I use to have a friend, let me not call her friend but
acquaintance! She is my favorite example for a lot of topics I write about
because for some reason she just fills that part the right way.
I am calling her acquaintance, former friend because we are
no longer that. I do not blame her though, I see what she did there though and
Before you get anything into your head, I did not do
anything and neither was I planning to. I have a basic rule about my friends’ men-I just don’t do them, exes
included. I just have this idea that when Karma comes for you, it slaps a
couple of hells out of you. On that note, have you seen the face of that woman
that was sliced open by the wife of the married man she was dealing with? Gone
are the days that women would use acid but how do you even report that? The
damage is already done! I am not saying that I am the world’s most intoxicating
creature but I don’t want to look like I walked into a wall either. You just don’t mess with another woman’s man;
because if she is crazy enough, she will come for you.
My mistake was in telling her that her ex had asked if we
could date; still don’t regret it though because that was me not keeping
secrets from the said ‘friend’.
She met a new guy a pilot and earning more than the current
boyfriend; dumped the boyfriend and moved on with the new man. That is when I
noticed since I was newly single that I was persona non grata. The friendship became sort of forced for me
and I understood why.We had all known the man even before change of status but
I have a completely different taste of man from her but that is something she
did not understand. The man would pay attention to me when he should not even
while the said friend was there. So when they became official and I was
completely ostracized I actually got it because when you are these good looking
it gets kind of tedious to be dealing with other women’s insecurities.
Like I said, I do not blame my friend but she had a good
friend in me because I have the man’s number and I can easily show her but I am
just not interested. On the other hand, some women do not have good friends and
those are the women I will write to.
You know when you are a wizard; you can bet your friends are
also wizards, ‘Birds of the same feather….’ So if you know you have some
behaviors, you bet that you also know your friends might have them. That is
why, if you know you can easily steal or you have been eyeing your friend’s
man, she will do the same. One of the reasons not to do introductions until
that assembly line is being set up.
Stupid is the woman
that takes her friend on the first date with her man
Don’t do it. Cement the relations first. Let them meet while
you are walking down the aisle. Most of the time, you are not as smart,
intelligent or good looking as you would like to think. So you bring your
friend that has a sense of humor, good-looking, knows how to dress and the wit
is on point (obviously I am talking about me).
The man’s focus will shift. He is not yet anything to you
and you do not want to end the night with him telling you, how amazing meeting
your friends was. That is how you end up in the friend zone and your friend
gets courted. Date your man, keep him away from the other wizards and when it
is time, you will know it is time.
Never let your man
see the qualities that you are lacking in your friend
Like I said, we knew this man before shift of status so we
had gone to his house. It irks me to be in a dirty house and I cannot use a
dirty kitchen or a dirty bathroom. My friend
on the other hand can sleep in it very comfortably and wake up and eat in it.
Every time we had to cook, I would clean up before and after, I don’t know what
my friend was doing by the way. This man would appreciate and the friend would
feel bad but my friend understood that I do not like dirt at all but it still
caused a rift.
If you ever invite your friend to anything when your man is
around, you better anoint yourself with wifely, homely, prim and proper skills.
Don’t let her do anything for your man, ever. He cannot find out she does it
better because now he will start asking himself what else she can do better in
private. You don’t want that. As long as your man is around, serve him and your
friend better not even come close. Remember, they see each other at the assembly
line. When she has left, you can be the ratchet that you always are with him
but don’t let her stunt on you.
Your weaknesses are
easily highlighted when you bring better versions of you around
Everyone has a weak point and a strong point but you do not want
that battle in something that you really want and desire. You are already
trying to keep it together with the man alone. You do not want to be outshone
by a friend.
You do not want him
to see that you have no mind of your own.
If you have to consult other people before making small
decisions that concern you alone, you can come across as a child. On a date, he
asks, ‘What would you like to eat?’ then you turn and ask your friend what she
would like and she gives an answer without looking dimwitted. You are already
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