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4 reasons he does not want sex

16 March 2016, 22:27 Shakila Alivitsa

Nairobi - He does not want sex. Why? Here's why.

The kids’ factor- You are just a mum now!

New mothers already have a lot to contend with and after that they suffer anxiety as to whether they would ever be able to get back on that intimate side of things. First of all, to clear this up for a lot of men, no, the size of a baby’s head does not render the vagina into being whatever you want to call it. It is programmed to go back to its initial state.

As bad as it sounds, kids can really ruin a couple’s sex life. For men, especially if you are on the third, you just start seeing your wife as a mother and nothing else. It is worse when he also starts calling you, ‘Mum!’ because he does not know what else to call you around the kids. It goes from mental and is practiced in the physical as well.  That is why you are asked, kindly-I am also asking kindly and not berating you-to try be sexy. Just the normal stuff, don’t give up on your appearance, you can still dress sexy with a slight tummy, smell nice and keep your hair neat. You don’t have to smell of kids vomit and look angry all the time.

Sex has sort of become lackluster between the two of you

I will blame both parties on this one. It is not women alone that should try spice things up; men should too. But as a lady, when you are the first to spot the decline, start working on it and trying to revive it. Obviously it is harder to be spontaneous with a growing family and 8-7 work hours but I am sure you can find something- a weekend or an hour works fine.

Men can also be insecure about their bodies

For men, when they spot a belly on them they congratulate themselves on how well they are living and why men with bigger bellies have greater sex lives rather than stress about it like women; but not all men. For some, they will get uncomfortable about it and that might lead to less initiation on their part because he is now also thinking your mind is on it as well. So it might just be up to you to initiate things.

Other things on his mind

Work, money, and bills-need I say more? It is not you. It might be all these.

Performance anxiety

Don’t be scathing with your corrections or how you want things or how someone has never satisfied you; especially if you are married to them. You might end up sex less.

Or he is just not in the mood!


- MyNews24

Disclaimer: All articles and letters published on MyNews24 have been independently written by members of News24's community. The views of users published on News24 are therefore their own and do not necessarily represent the views of News24. News24 editors also reserve the right to edit or delete any and all comments received.

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