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3 ways to save your falling relationship

07 September 2015, 21:39 Shakila Alivitsa

Nairobi - Is your relationship on the rocks? Here are some tips to save it.

Talk to your partner, like really talk to your partner.

If two people can never really know how to communicate to their partner then they do not know that they really do not understand each other. That is the beginning of all problems. Most people think that by going silent, banging doors, space and forgetting the problem then coming back and acting as if it did not happen fixes things. It does not and that is why you keep going back to the problem every time an issue comes up. You remind them, you remember when you did this or that. Hash it out so that the both of you understand where the other is coming from.

Realize that expectations never match reality

Going into a relationship, everyone has their own idealistic views of what their partner should be and how they should act. The problems comes in when you pick out everything your partner does and keep telling them how they have failed you and how they deceived you. Yes, they said they would be good to you and treat you right but at times, their best does not match your best. You need to understand your partner and know how they treat what they value. If they are doing their level best then you need to start learning to appreciate that because that is when they stop all together and now you have to start fixing it to bring it all back.

You need to learn to apply SWOT in your life, your relationship.

S-Strengths,  W-Weaknesses,  O-Opportunity  and T-Threats.

What makes you stronger as a couple? Keep maintaining and improving on that. What makes you weak as a couple? Either work your way around them, figure out a way to avoid them: petty confrontations, constant bickering just because, jealousy and possessiveness and making your partner feel less of what they are. Opportunities are those things you are overlooking or taking for ranted but when you could actually pay attention to them, it would make you stronger and better: spontaneity, hobbies, personal interests that took a back seat, anything new and different. Threats, these are self explanatory depending with what your partner might do if you were not there. Other women or men, cheating, materialism and spending habits, alcoholism and late nights; these are what get you to where you are now. Wanting to fix things.

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