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3 tips to avoiding a bad marriage

31 March 2016, 19:48 Shakila Alivitsa

Nairobi - Marriage is quickly becoming obsolete by the way. In our society it is even more obvious because there are less and less people willing to settle down when they can get into convenient arrangement and no one to give them a baleful eye. Parents are even inciting it rather than condemning it because of their bad experience. They are the ones telling you; focus on school and getting your own money, don’t ruin your life by bringing wrong people in. So today there really is no pressure.

On the other hand, there are people that are still a bit of some traditionalists who like the idea of family and not just going to an empty house. There are people who don’t enjoy the idea of a bar24/7 because of the nothingness in your life.

So how do enjoy family and all aspects of it without the drama. The answer has always been simple-the right partner. Get the partner wrong and that is your downhill.

Love is nice but love is only 1/8…the rest 7/8 are other things

You have to choose someone that is bearable in their worst. Their characteristics and habits are not things that you are looking to change. Don’t marry because of love and infatuation because they are no the things that will help you keep it together when this person is driving you toward the wall. At times you will forget about love but if you can appreciate the other things about them, then it will be easier.

Someone you have the right type of communication with

Silent treatments are not a good sign in a relationship. Not being able to confront your issues is really risky. Walking on eggshells, will not save your situation; if you have this type of relationship, be wary unless you can solve this problem, you are committing yourself to doom. You are setting the tune to your marriage and that is why for most couples after the kids are no longer there to keep the conversation going, you are mum around each other. You have reached a point where there is nothing to talk about.

If you two while dating keep meeting roadblocks, there is problem

It can be constant push and pull on money, family problems, decisions making-you two cannot just catch a rest day. You have a problem and you really should consider letting that relationship go. I am not saying that people do not have their issues but at least, they are not always dealing with something. As if they are forcing the relationship. End it before you get in hot water and look for someone you can be amicable with. Hot tempers and high heat are not always about passion unless it’s in the bedroom.

This part is very important because most couples overlook it thinking that as long as they are talking, arguing and solving it’s a good deal. A relationship is not a job where you are employed to solve problems-people do get tired. That is why down the line after making such a big commitment couples end up with bigger issues like affairs, cheating, adultery, and outsiders.


- MyNews24

Disclaimer: All articles and letters published on MyNews24 have been independently written by members of News24's community. The views of users published on News24 are therefore their own and do not necessarily represent the views of News24. News24 editors also reserve the right to edit or delete any and all comments received.

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