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3 signs your man is lying to you

30 November 2015, 14:54 Shakila Alivitsa

Nairobi - Is the man you are with committed to you?

How do you define the effort you need from the man you want

There is effort, and then there is effort. There is the effort that the men know and the one that women define for themselves. If a man is really putting in any effort on you, then you are already his girlfriend or wife, he did not need time to think or to heal. On the other hand, the woman, you, receive calls every Friday or weekend and you are happy, because he is inviting you to his house; that man needs help with dishes and laundry. You washed because you did not want him to think you are lazy and so that he could call you his but it still has not happened yet either get out of there or get comfortable while he continues looking for what he will call ‘his soul mate’.

If you are not his wife, girlfriend, or he has never ever claimed you to anyone and when you meet his family or friends he says this is my friend; do not clean anything. By the way just because you have met them does not automatically mean anything. Unless he puts it out there, you are just that, another woman in his life.

Dates are not for you but you know he likes going out and having fun

Are you not fun? Then why is it that the only place he feels comfortable with you is at his house? Never, even once has that man ever involved you in anything outside the house but you feel it is special that you have keys to his house and can open the door for yourself and cook some Ugali for your supper that Saturday and it is end month. If you are in a friends with benefits agreement, that is fine-still I recommend you do not wash anything. Does he come to clean your house? If you are using that as a ruse to become something more I should inform you only 1% ever make it there. Its either you say what you want from the beginning or you stick to the FWB; but if what you want is to be treated like a girlfriend, girlfriends are pampered.

If you have ever fallen for the line money is tight, you are helping him making a clown out of you

Money is never tight for any man that wants a particular woman. He knows where to get it, they figure it out. But here you are struggling or maybe not struggling to pay your own fare in a matatu, buying groceries and planning how you will help him cook and clean because he needs that help. Well if he sees you only as a maid that is your fault, not his. 

It is not yet the right time; just wait

You as the woman in the relationship, you can tell when it has reached that point when either the two of you settle down or someone gets heartbroken. A man knows how testy the age thing is when she has spent all her time with you and he knows he does not want her anymore. What he will do instead is just tell you wait every time you bring that conversation up. So what do you do? You listen to him and wait. Next thing you know he just runs the minute he finds his ‘future’ and he goes and hides behind her skirt. She will not understand your situation because now you are playing with her territory. What are you dealing with now; confusion, heartbreak, lost time, starting over, being old and all because you listened to him when he said, ‘wait’. Continue waiting.

Now there are those being exploited within a relationship. That is a discussion for another time though.

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- MyNews24

Disclaimer: All articles and letters published on MyNews24 have been independently written by members of News24's community. The views of users published on News24 are therefore their own and do not necessarily represent the views of News24. News24 editors also reserve the right to edit or delete any and all comments received.

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