3 signs your man is lying to you
30 November 2015, 14:54
Nairobi - Is the man you are with committed to you?
How do you define the
effort you need from the man you want
There is effort, and then there is effort. There is the
effort that the men know and the one that women define for themselves. If a man
is really putting in any effort on you, then you are already his girlfriend or
wife, he did not need time to think or to heal. On the other hand, the woman,
you, receive calls every Friday or weekend and you are happy, because he is
inviting you to his house; that man needs help with dishes and laundry. You
washed because you did not want him to think you are lazy and so that he could
call you his but it still has not happened yet either get out of there or get
comfortable while he continues looking for what he will call ‘his soul mate’.
If you are not his wife,
girlfriend, or he has never ever claimed you to anyone and when you meet his
family or friends he says this is my friend; do not clean anything. By the way
just because you have met them does not automatically mean anything. Unless he
puts it out there, you are just that, another woman in his life.
Dates are not for you but you know he likes going out and having fun
Are you not fun? Then why is it
that the only place he feels comfortable with you is at his house? Never, even
once has that man ever involved you in anything outside the house but you feel
it is special that you have keys to his house and can open the door for
yourself and cook some Ugali for your supper that Saturday and it is end month.
If you are in a friends with benefits agreement, that is fine-still I recommend
you do not wash anything. Does he come to clean your house? If you are using
that as a ruse to become something more I should inform you only 1% ever make
it there. Its either you say what you want from the beginning or you stick to
the FWB; but if what you want is to be treated like a girlfriend, girlfriends
If you have ever fallen for the line money is tight, you are helping
him making a clown out of you
Money is never tight for any man
that wants a particular woman. He knows where to get it, they figure it out.
But here you are struggling or maybe not struggling to pay your own fare in a
matatu, buying groceries and planning how you will help him cook and clean
because he needs that help. Well if he sees you only as a maid that is your
fault, not his.
It is not yet the right time; just wait
You as the woman in the
relationship, you can tell when it has reached that point when either the two
of you settle down or someone gets heartbroken. A man knows how testy the age
thing is when she has spent all her time with you and he knows he does not want
her anymore. What he will do instead is just tell you wait every time you bring
that conversation up. So what do you do? You listen to him and wait. Next thing
you know he just runs the minute he finds his ‘future’ and he goes and hides
behind her skirt. She will not understand your situation because now you are
playing with her territory. What are you dealing with now; confusion,
heartbreak, lost time, starting over, being old and all because you listened to
him when he said, ‘wait’. Continue waiting.
Now there are those being
exploited within a relationship. That is a discussion for another time though.
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