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3 signs you are in the wrong relationship

26 April 2016, 22:55 Shakila Alivitsa

Nairobi - A couple of years ago, I had a plan. The plan was to get married by the time I was 25 and have babies. That time I even had a partner by the way. Ask me what happened because obviously it did not happen. We lived together!

You know that time you go to see your boyfriend and one weekend becomes a month? That sort of thing. We had been in a relationship for five years and we thought we were ripe-like you know what I mean?

At times you do not see some things up until you are in close quarters.

You do not realize that your relationship is over

See each other only on weekends and odd dates and you will think that you have a good thing going. You will not even realize that things are not the way they used to be and that is what happened to us. We did not even know that we had been trying so hard to keep the relationship together until we started living with each other.

Someone thinks they can put up with your character until they know your habits

There is so much faking and falsehoods in a lot of today’s relationships that most people need come we stays before they do any other thing. Trust me; you do not know your partner until you actually leave with them. It is so easy to put up a front when someone only sees you for an hour, a day or a weekend. Try living with that same person for a month, then two, then three-that is how you know if you are ready for them and a life with them. We were not. We had changed so much over the years that now even the slightest thing, ticked the other one off.

You see what you had been trying to prevent yourself from seeing

You know when someone tells you, ‘love is blind’? At times I do not think that they are being romantic but they are sending out warning signals. Like you need to really open your eyes and look. It is so easy to overlook anything from your partner or what they do when you get to spend only short periods of time with them. But try living with bad habits, bad attitude, bad energy, every day and you are telling yourself that is what you want to commit to.  Now you start seeing that you cannot deal with it every day for the rest of your life. Now you know, so what are you going to do about it? Their drinking is okay when you are there for only like two days until you realsie they do it every day. There abuse is okay for two days because the other five you are not with them. Now imagine it very single day. Waking up to it and sleeping to it.

There are the very few majority that cross over this point and realize that they really want to be with this person. They are lucky because they at least were real and honest with themselves by trying to spend more time with each other to see if they could live a life with each other.

You will be told, ‘don’t live with a man if he has not put a ring on your finger’ but at times you do not need that ring in order for you to know that maybe you could have ruined each other’s lives if you had lived together. That is just my honesty. You do not need to use a straight path to get to where you want to go. At times you just jump in and see if you can swim. If you can’t and meet sharks, you jump out and admit that water wasn’t for you anyway.

- MyNews24

Disclaimer: All articles and letters published on MyNews24 have been independently written by members of News24's community. The views of users published on News24 are therefore their own and do not necessarily represent the views of News24. News24 editors also reserve the right to edit or delete any and all comments received.

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