3 signs of failed relationships
15 September 2015, 13:32
Nairobi - How do failed relationships look like. Why are they so?
You let other things
get in the way of the two of you
You let other things: career, work, children, pressure, and
family among other things get in the way of what the two of you had. Life gets
in the way and most of the time you barely notice that things are going sour
because by the time you get home you just want to sleep and you repeat the same
routine every day. You live in the same house but you and your partner are
living separate lives.
You are still holding
on to resentment and bitterness.
I have noticed that with people who are in bad, broken
marriages; one partner did something to the other a long time ago that the
other partner could never recover from. Maybe they said they did not have
another family, or they cheated with one partner for a long time and the other
partner was the one that had to pick up the pieces. They thought their partner
would change but they never have. So you are living with someone that you are
having an internally repressed feud and grudge that you cannot get over. It
becomes passive aggressive within the marriage until things just fall apart.
You are fifty and now is when you want to kick someone out.
You are not happy at
the way things turned out
In the beginning we all like to romanticize things and if
not we hope for the best and screen out the factor that mistakes, circumstances
and situations can change things. Ten years down the line and now you are
starting to be angry because you are not happy, you want to blame someone and
your life is hopelessly not what you want. I would advise you to take what you
have now and make the best out of it. After 10+ years of marriage, try to make
it work if your partner is willing to try it with you and not be bitter about
past mistakes. You only become more miserable when you wake up and sleep
coveting a non-existent life. Make what you have now work because starting at
50 is hard when your age-mates are settled into their lives.
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