3 reasons to mind your own relationship business
12 November 2015, 13:47
Nairobi - It does not just have to be a friend but it may also be a
family member, relative or even a colleague. Can you save them from a situation
that is clearly not good for them; something that they choose to ignore,
‘because everybody else is just the same’ to them. Or someone whom they think
they are saving by being with them but the person is just bringing them down as
At times you think that they do not know how badly this
other person mistreats them but they actually do. She is not a child so she
knows what abuse is, what being in a relationship should be about and what she
should not tolerate. So why doesn't she just leave? If you bring it up either they
hold a grudge or they just ignore you.
Do you want to save her at the expense of your relationship
That is one of the questions you should actually ask
yourself because it might happen that if she learns to let go of what she has
now and does not settle well in the aftermath-you will take the blame. If she
does not heal from the bad relationship and carries it with her to all the
relationships, she will blame that failure on you. Your friend, sister,
relative or workmate will blame you for everything wrong that happens
afterwards and she might end up resenting you for it. Are you ready for that?
You can also only save someone who wants to be saved
Why doesn't she leave? She is not ready to, for starters;
she just does not want to and so she plays the card, ‘it is none of your
business’. History also plays a key role; at times the idea of starting over
can be a bit intimidating and off putting. They would rather continue surviving in their current situation
because to her, ‘all relationships have problems either way; at least she knows
what she is getting.
Help someone who comes to you for help
They are ready so that is not the time to judge them and
tell them how you have been right all these years. If they are ready to leave,
assure them that you will be there for them. It is hard as it is to get out of
something that has ended up being a hard lesson. It is even harder when you
have to do it when you are alone. That plays a part for a lot of women who stay
in bad relationships; they just have no one who is actually interested in
helping them. They want to give an opinion but when it is time to play ball,
they stand by the fence and judge.
For the latest on national news, politics, sport, entertainment and more follow us on Twitter and like our Facebook page!
Disclaimer: All articles and letters published on MyNews24 have been independently written by members of News24's community. The views of users published on News24 are therefore their own and do not necessarily represent the views of News24. News24 editors also reserve the right to edit or delete any and all comments received.