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3 MUSTS before marriage

14 October 2015, 17:34 Shakila Alivitsa

Nairobi - There are things you must agree with your partner before marriage.


I like the way human beings like thinking they are cleverer than the next person. Someone tells you that they do not ever want to have children; that they never want to wake up at 2 to screaming and changing diapers instead of having coffee. Then in your mind you are thinking that you will change their mind, seeing other families will change their mind, love will change their mind or some other thing will. Wrong! Science has helped people be two steps ahead in their planning. Someone already might have had a vasectomy or tied their tubes. You keep wondering why even without protection you two have never had an ‘accident’. You should take your partners word and decide if that is what you want to deal with for the rest of your life. Number of children included.

Money and Lifestyle

Someone I was dating once told me I would be in charge of the household expenses and they take care of everything else. Does not sound like a bad deal does it? But let me tell you, I do not want someone to be telling me how I should be spending my money. I would rather offer and that is why we did not agree. I like cooking and buying groceries but the reason I got mad is because he dared to budget for me. You and your partner should be in agreement about the money you make, and everyone offers what they are willing to foot, what type of lifestyle you both want and how you expect the other to meet their duties. If in conflict, pull out now because that is going to be a major and constant issue. Money is an everyday decision so just imagine having that same argument every day.


The ones that like sleeping over and coming unexpectedly; the ones that like being part of your budget-they expect you to take care of them that means that your partner is also going to shoulder it; the intrusive ones and the ones that like setting up shop at your place for long periods of time. You might enjoy it but your partner might not like it. It will tear the two of you apart if it is something that keeps happening.

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Disclaimer: All articles and letters published on MyNews24 have been independently written by members of News24's community. The views of users published on News24 are therefore their own and do not necessarily represent the views of News24. News24 editors also reserve the right to edit or delete any and all comments received.

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