My husband wears my panties
16 November 2015, 11:19
A short while ago my husband of over 20 years started shaving or trimming his pubic hair, 1 time he even left a little landing strip like he likes on me. I told him that I don't like it and think its gay. Recently I found out that he has been wearing my panties when he is home alone, always my sexy see through thongs. I suspected someone in my panty drawer and took careful notice if they were disturbed, on confronting him he admitted to wearing them, it was a huge fight with him very sorry in words, but I still notice a slight trim and every now and then my panties not exactly how I left them. Other than this he is always horny for me and we have frequent sex, but I am suspicious now, is he a crossdresser or could he have gay tendencies. He has said its only my panties and nothing else, but everything starts somewhere. I have heard of men shaving, but he trims and shaves like a bikini shave. He always liked to watch me use a life like vibrator, of which I obviously got rid of. I am going on a bit but its in my connecting the dots. I have found mfm porn on his computer and something called cuckhold where the husband has oral sex with the other man or cleans his wife orally after the other man. He always comes into the gynae with me, actually I think he would watch me with another man, and all these things together make me wonder who I am married to. Shaving, panties, dildo, watching gynae, sick porn. Could it be he is a bit feminine on the inside, even bi and would want a mfm. I don't understand. Am I married to a bi man??? or does he just have a sick panty, shaving fetish. can you work out these dots
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Answer from Health24 Sexologist:
Your husband is a cross-dresser (transvestite) with a cuckholding fantasy. Cross dressers are often heterosexual men that get aroused by wearing female clothing. There are lots of fantasies that people have and cucholding just happens to be one of them. Your husband is not a pervert or child-molester but a cross-dresser with a certain fantasy.
Unfortunately, any fetish is brain wired and very resistant to change. I recommend that you expand your knowledge on the topic before you make any hasty decisions. I also recommend that you both see a sex therapist to help you get more clarity regarding what you want to do now that you know about your husband's cross dressing.
Some couples stay together and incorporate the cross-dressing in their life and lovemaking; other partners split up. Getting professional help can really help you make these tough decisions.
If the worst case scenario happens and you get to the mutual decision to end your relationship, then I would recommend to your cross-dressing partner to be more honest about that in his next relationship (e.g. advertising online in specific cross-dressing dating communities; or if looking for a partner on more general online dating sites, he should make it clear in his profile that he is a cross dresser looking for a partner).
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